Accidentally Falling
by AleciaCullen21
Summary: Bonnie's mind and heart are at war about who to love. After spending four months alone with who she calls the devil, she began questioning which to trust her mind or her heart.
1. Heart to Mind

**DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE. AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH WHOM, SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER MIND OR HER HEART.**

 **PROLOGUE**

 _I never thought, not in a million years that I could hate someone the way I hated him, Damon. He came into my life and threatened it, time and time again, he even attempted to kill me. He placed everyone I love dearly in grave danger more times than I cared to admit and even murdered a few._

 _Now here I am, attempting to talk myself out of having feelings for him, that's right, me, Bonnie Bennett after spending four months with him alone in prison world I've fallen for him. What have I done?_

 **CHAPTER ONE: Heart to Mind**

I could not believe I was happy to see him. I didn't even know why I made him pancakes; it became such a tradition with us in the prison world that I didn't know how else to greet him. When he entered through the door, I could have sworn my heart beat just a little bit faster.

He opened his arms for me while brandishing that smile of his and I knew my heart stopped, if only for a second. In that second I flew into his arms, it was such an indescribable feeling, I mean I had hugged him before, well once, but this was different on so many levels.

"You made it Bonnie," he said, as he lowered me to the floor, before releasing me. I stepped back from him and replied nervously.

"Well, I couldn't have done it without you... and that rock of magic, of course." I was such a dork, I shook my head and mentally face palmed.

"It's still good to see you, Bonnie, I hate to admit it, but I missed you. Can you believe that I felt lost without you? A couple of days after I had returned to Mystic Falls. I felt so out of place like something was missing. I didn't know how much I've grown so used to you and me alone you know." He confessed calmly unbeknown to him the heart explosion I was having behind him. He noticed my silence and swirled around to appraised me.

"How are things with you and Elena?" I blurted out, then pretended that I didn't just dampen my mood by bringing up Elena. But as soon as I did, I was pulled out of the whirlpool of emotions my heart had me in and back to the more stable reality. Damon was _Damon,_ the one who didn't care who he hurt and took what he wanted _when_ he wanted it.

That was how I saw him for years. Why should I suddenly change my opinion of him now? Just because he was the only company, I had for a couple of months? It did not excuse all he had done. Somehow my traitorous heart disagreed with my logic.

Bringing up Elena also brought up Jeremy in my mind, what was wrong with me? I was daydreaming about someone I wasn't even supposed to like.

"Funny thing about that, she compelled all her memories of us together away," he stated rather blankly I was so preoccupied with my thoughts I barely heard what he had said.

"Bonnie?" he asked. "Huh?" Was my brilliant reply.

"Weren't you listening, Elena asked Alaric to erase all her memories of us together, I can't believe he would do that," he sighed, as hard as I tried to minimize the soft spot forming inside me for him, I knew Elena must have been hurting to do something like that. I walked over to where he sat, swirling a glass of bourbon in his hand; I sat in the chair opposite him.

"I mean I understand that she was in pain, but to erase everything about us, that's something I would never do, no matter how painful living without her seemed." He continued evidently very hurt.

"I'm so sorry Damon," I replied, sympathetic for him. After a few minutes of silence, he gestured to the video recorder on the table.

"You brought that with you?" he asked retrieving the video recorder, as he did, I remembered my last few minutes in the 1903 prison world.

"The weirdest thing happened just before I left, the prisons world began to shift from 1994 to 1903, and there was a woman," I said.

"A woman?" He asked curiously.

"Yeah," I replied I took the video recorder and showed him the video that was, captured moments before I came back to Mystic Falls. A strange expression appeared on his face.

"What is it?" I asked, confused by the sudden change in his facial expression.

"I can't believe it; it's my mother." He gasped apparently shocked by this.

"No way!" I said, I grabbed the camera from his hands and looked at the woman again.

"I think I would know what my mother looks like, don't you think?" he replied, rising from the couch and moving over to the table to pour himself another drink.

"I'm gonna ignore that last comment since you're not quite yourself right now," I replayed the video a couple of times. "I thought your mother died back when you and Stefan were human, how could she be here?" I moved over to where he stood and drank his bourbon. I returned the video camera to his hand, and he stood there staring at the screen, still in disbelief.

"That Bonnie is what I want to know." he said thoughtfully, then turned and looked at me.

"There must be an explanation." I reasoned, trying to make sense of everything happening, but when had anything ever made sense in Mystic Falls.

"There better be and a good one at that." Damon downed the liquor he had in his glass then poured himself another. A human Damon would have died a long time ago with the amount of alcohol he consumed. I didn't know what Damon had on his mind at that moment or what he had planned to do about his mother, but I had a feeling that whatever it was, I sure wouldn't like it.

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE:** **This is my first shot at a Vampire Diaries fanfic, I hope you guys liked it. Merry Christmas to you all.**


	2. Kai Complications

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS, AND FAVS, IT MEANS ALOT. THEY MEAN A LOT.  
**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO, THEY ALL BELONG TO LJ SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE. AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH WHOM, SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER MIND OR HER HEART.**

 _"There better be and a good one at that." Damon downed the liquor he had in his glass then poured himself another. A human Damon would have died a long time ago with the amount of alcohol he consumed.  
_

 _I didn't know what Damon had on his mind at that moment or what he had planned to do about his mother, but I had a feeling that whatever it was, I sure wouldn't like it._

 **CHAPTER TWO: Kai Complications**

So much had changed, I had missed a lot. Not only had Elena erased her memories of Damon, but Alaric was human now so Elena could not regain them. Alaric was also engaged to be married to a witch, a doctor named Joe who surprisingly was pregnant. Worst of all Caroline's mother passed away.

I wished I had been here to show my support. Caroline should have had more support. She wouldn't have flipped her humanity switch, and I wouldn't be at a severely lame college party looking for her if she did. I was in the prison world for so long I think I became anti-social, large crowds now made me uncomfortable.

"See anything?" Elena asked stopping before me, her hands on her hips.

"Nope, I can't believe Caroline would do this, Caroline has always handled this vampire thing so well; sometimes I don't even see her as, one you know." I sighed frustrated but equally understanding of what she must be feeling. I felt the same when my father got killed by Silas.

At some point we finally caught up with her, at first, I couldn't tell if her humanity was on or off, she seemed the same, like the old Caroline until she threatened to wreak havoc if we didn't leave her alone.

She wanted just a year to herself; we reluctantly agreed since there was no getting through to her.

* * *

Physically and emotionally exhausted, as soon as I reached home, I could only make it as far as the couch before I collapsed.

"I see your day has taken a toll on you." A gasped escaped me, and I flew up into a sitting position and turned to where the voice derived.

"Damon! You scared me what are you doing here?" I asked, my legs folded beneath me on the couch.

"What? I can't visit my best friend?" He graced me with that smirk of his then moved and sat beside of me.

"Best friend, huh since when?" I asked, trying to slow my rapidly beating heart due to his proximity.

"Since you shared all your dirty little secrets with me during our alone time." He said as he wiggled his eyebrows at me.

"What do you want Damon?" I responded instead poorly pretending to be perplexed by his company. The humor fell from his face, and he looked solemn, leaning back on the couch, he released a sigh; I knew something was wrong then.

"I know this is the last thing I should be asking of you, but I need to." He started then took a deep breath before he continued.

"Kai wants to see you, to apologize." He murmured then turned to face me; he must be joking a chuckle escaped me then I went into full blown mad person mode and cracked up.

"Wow, that's funny, I thought you said Kai wanted to apologize, that was a good one." After I had calmed down from my high, I waited for him to confirm his joke, but he didn't.

"It wasn't a joke Bonnie he knows about my mother; he agreed to tell me everything if he could apologize to you." I quickly rose to my feet and moved towards the window. I thought for a moment, then turned to face him, I scoffed in disbelief and horror at his earnest expression.

"Your kidding, right, how could you even ask that Damon." I glared at him while I tried to grasped what little control I had left and not blew his brain to bits.

"Bonnie-..."

"NO! Damon I can't and I won't." I interrupted, firm in my decision, I rushed to the stairs, and took them two at a time to get to my room before I slammed the door shut. I stood and stared around my tiny bedroom overcame with emotion.

I realized how lonely my home had become, ever since my dad died. I now understood why Elena chose to burn her house down when Jeremy died and why Caroline switched it all off. If only I had that same luxury.

I climbed into bed, hoping, to turn it off the only way I knew how but unfortunately sleep didn't come. A few minutes later I heard a knock on my door, then it unlocked. I heard footsteps on the wooden floor as they slowly ventured further into the room.

"Go away, Damon, I'm not speaking to Kai," I said, pulling the covers closer to my body when there was no response I turned and looked in the direction of the doorway. I swore I was having a heart attack and was teleported back to 1994.

"Bonnie please ju.. Just hear me out," Kai said, moving further into my room, I flew out of bed so fast my head spun.

"Don't you dare take another step you leech, you need to get the hell out of my house right now," I shouted as what little control I had disappeared. Damon appeared in the doorway at that moment with his hands raised as if about to approach a wild animal. I felt my heart shattered; I was, hurt.

"How could you?" I whispered I couldn't believe he would do something like that.

"Do you have any idea what he did to me." I gasped barely able to contain my angry as I pointed to Kai, who was about to say something before I held out my hand and both Kai and Damon fell to their knees holding their heads in pain.

I grabbed my coat and keys and fled through the door, down the stairs, and into my car. I didn't know where I was going, but I couldn't stay there another second.

 **Author's Note: Tell me what you think, until next time, Happy New Year to you all!  
**


	3. The Meaning of Friendship

**AN: THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO, THEY ALL BELONG TO LJ SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE. AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH WHOM, SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER MIND OR HER HEART.  
**

 _"Do you have any idea what he did to me." I gasped barely able to contain my angry as I pointed to Kai, who was about to say something before I held out my hand and both Kai and Damon fell to their knees holding their heads in pain._

 _I grabbed my coat and keys and fled through the door, down the stairs, and into my car. I didn't_

 _know where I was going, but I couldn't stay there another second._

 **CHAPTER THREE: The Meaning of Friendship**

I drove for hours and the anger that I felt towards those idiots I left at my house still bubbled within me. I didn't know how to be rid of it. I had never been so angry before, not even at Elena when my mom got turned into a vampire.

I wasn't even this mad when my Grams died, even though I blamed Damon and his unhealthy obsession with Katherine.

I hated Damon that time and yet I was never this mad at him, not even when he tried to kill me. I didn't know if it was because I understood the pain he felt on some twisted level.

He did think he lost the love of his life, but did that excuse his behavior? Of course not, Damon had always been a man of shoot first, ask questions later, that was what he had been doing for the past hundred and fifty years.

I thought he had changed. I was so stupid, when would I ever learn. I took a look at where I was, not so sure if I should continue driving but doing so regardless. The road ahead stretched out so far; I didn't even know if I was still in Mystic Falls. I continued until awareness forced me to stop and investigate where I was, I pulled over and turned off the engine.

I took out my phone and turned it on. Immediately after booting up it started to ring. It was Damon; I was so tempted to answer and say I forgive you, just like I always did in the prison world.

He drove me crazy when we were in there, so crazy that I fell for him! _Crazy right?_ The phone stopped its sharp ringing only to start up again, but this time, it was Elena. I released a long sigh and reluctantly prepared myself.

"Bonnie?" Asked the mellowed voice of Elena.

"Hey, Elena," I said my voice soft and resigned

"Oh Thank God, Bonnie where are you I've been so worried." _Great,_ I felt guilty for worrying her, I bet if Caroline were in her right mind she would be trying to reach me too.

"I'm sorry, Elena I didn't mean to worry you." I heaved and ran a hand over my face

"I know what happened Bonnie, and I'm sorry, do you wanna talk about it?" I forgot what good friends Elena, and I used to be before all the vampire stuff happened.

"Um. Not over the phone perhaps when I get home, I just need to clear, my head it's kinda complicated."

"Where are you Bonnie?" she asked I had a feeling that Elena wasn't the only one who wanted to know where I was, the other person was not someone I wanted to converse with at the moment.

"I'm all right, okay I'll talk to later, just give me some more time." I listened for her reply, but there was no sound on the other end of the line for a while then-...

"Bonnie?" asked the quiet voice of Damon on the other end, my breath caught in my throat as I tried to remain silent, my anger fluctuated, and I was left conflicted. I was tempted to shout at him for bringing Kai near me, but then I wanted just to tell him to come, get me and take me home.

"Bonnie, please! I'm so, sorry. I wasn't thinking, just talk to me please." The desperation in his voice made the battle I was having with myself more challenging. I wanted so bad just to say I forgive you. My feelings were all over the place my heart wanted to forgive him, to tell him where I was so he could find me.

In my mind, I knew what he had done, was almost unforgivable, and the anger was there. It told me giving in too quickly wouldn't be a good thing. Closing my eyes, I took in a breath of determination and quickly ended the call then turned my phone off.

I sat there for a minute before I turned the car around and headed back to Mystic Falls. I crossed the Welcome to Mystic Falls sign faster than I anticipated. I didn't immediately drove back to my house. My house did not felt like home anymore. I drove around mindless; I tried to avoid going home as long as I could, in case someone was there waiting for me.

* * *

Eventually, I pulled into my driveway and exited the car. I pulled out my keys and headed up to the porch but froze on the spot by the steps. Damon sat on the porch steps; he looked up when he heard my approach.

I was about to turn back to my car not having the courage to face him, but somehow I knew he wasn't going to let me leave so quickly. Before I could even finish turning, he was in front of me. I couldn't bear to look him in the eyes, afraid if I did, I'd give in too effortlessly.

"Bonnie, just hear me out I never meant to hurt you," he said bending his head. He wanted me to look up at him

"I can't do this right now okay, please leave Damon." I kept my head to the ground and tried to side-stepped him.

"What can I do, I'll do anything..."

"Leave Damon... Please, I..I can't, I just can't..." I turned and ran up to the porch. I tried to open the door; I had hoped, once inside I could bar the doors or something. I was so full of nerves; the door wouldn't open.

The hair on the back of my neck stood up when I felt Damon approached me. I gave up trying to open the door and placed my forehead on it. A hand appeared on my upper right arm and gave it a squeeze; a shiver ran up my spine, and I knew that he felt it too.

"I don't wanna lose you as a friend, Bonnie, I... It's hard to explain, but I just can't imagine, not having you as a friend." He whispered. I couldn't give in; I just couldn't it was not for me to let something go, so simply. I tried the door one more time and thanked God it opened quickly, I entered.

"You should have thought of that before Damon." I closed the door behind me without looking back and leaned against it; weirdly I felt his presence on the other side. He could with ease, had pushed the doors opened if he wanted to, a little bolt wouldn't stop him but he didn't.

A couple of minutes later he left, I heard his car drove off, and a sign of relief escaped me. I pulled my bag from my back and took out my cell phone; I turned it over in my hand, contemplating if I should turn it on or not.

Eventually, I did; Alerts of missed calls and messages pinged continuously. There were texts from Matt, Elena, and Damon, whose messages I didn't bother to check. There were also, missed calls from Jeremy.

I called Elena to let her know that I was home and doing fine as well as Matt, and ignored Damon messages, but I didn't know what to do with Jeremy's. I listened to a few where he claimed he wanted to see me. I had been putting off trying talking to him mainly because I didn't know what to say.

The truth of the matter was I just didn't feel the way I use to feel for him anymore, and I didn't know how to tell him. The light coming through the windows startled me; I didn't realize that I had been up almost all night.

I decided to head up to bed, to get some sleep. I was climbing the stairs when my phone rang; it was Jeremy why he was calling me so early? I had no idea.

"Hello."

"Hey Bonnie, I didn't wake you, did I?"

"No, you didn't. "

"Okay, good so...um How are you?"

"I'm all right; I've meant to call you, I... haven't been able to so yeah, I'm glad you called." My eyes reach for the heavens as I face palmed at my stupidity.

"Right so...um I was hoping that we could... Um, go out to lunch you know, to talk about us and I really would like to see you."

"Um... Sure, we can do that." There was a pause, and I waited for him to continue.

"I missed you, so much Bonnie, you have no idea every day that you left."

As I listened to his words I felt guilty, Jeremy's so sweet, and he didn't do anything wrong, it was my choice to die and leave him. Now things were more complicated than ever, because of one person, I was hurting the people I cared about, I was losing myself all because of him, Damon.

 **Author's Note: Hope you guys liked it, sit tight there's more to come.**


	4. The Art of Absolution

**AN: THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO, THEY ALL BELONG TO LJ SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE. AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH WHOM, SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER MIND OR HER HEART.  
**

 _"I missed you, so much Bonnie, you have no idea every day that you left."_

 _As I listened to his words I felt guilty, Jeremy's so sweet, and he didn't do anything wrong, it was my choice to die and leave him. Now things were more complicated than ever, because of one person, I was hurting the people I cared about, I was losing myself all because of him, Damon._

 **CHAPTER FOUR: The Art of Absolution**

Caroline had been getting on my nerves lately, not only had she almost killed somebody on her little no humanity tour, but she dragged Stefan in to join her. Where was I when all this stuff was happening _oh right_ , I was driving around mindlessly trying to avoid Damon and now Jeremy apparently.

The lunch I had with Jeremy didn't go exactly how I had hoped; he talked about how he missed me and wanted us to be together again. He looked too sad when I didn't answer right away, the words that would surely have crushed his heart got caught in my throat.

I was saved by my phone and Elena, although I wasn't, from the crisis of Caroline. I was supposed to meet Elena in her dorm room, but when I had arrived she wasn't there. I rang her phone a few of times but got no answer.

I decided just to chill until she showed up. I looked around her room while I waited, I didn't get a chance to the last time I was in here, she had a couple of pictures on the wall and dresser.

There were pictures of me and her together as well as her and Caroline, Jeremy, Matt, and Stefan but none of her and Damon. She had erased her entire relationship with him wow, I wish I could do the same.

 _No! You didn't_ my heart screamed at me, but I chose to ignore it. Fifteen minutes later Elena burst through the door.

"Sorry, I'm late a little crisis at the hospital." She said in a rush.

"It's okay... So, wanna fills me in?"

"Well, we need to do something about Caroline and Stefan, and we need to do it fast."

"Okay, what are we going to do?"

"I have no idea, but um... Stefan's Damon brother, Bonnie so he has to be here you know that right?"

"No, he doesn't and besides, since when are you guys cool again." She pulled me to sat beside her one of the beds.

"Come on Bonnie don't be stubborn, and I talked to Damon and since Alaric can't give me back my memories. I just can't see myself getting back together with him. I mean it must be a sign you know maybe we shouldn't have been together in the first place, and he agreed." She said.

"Wait! _What?_ " I couldn't believe what I had heard. "Did you just say Damon agreed that you guys shouldn't be together, cause that does not sound like Damon, at all."

"Yeah, he seems pretty fine with it, he did argue at first, but then he didn't have a problem with it anymore." Wow, Damon was giving up on him and Elena, that was just Crazy! Wasn't he the one who kept telling me in the prison world that Elena was the love of his life, but then again he did say the same thing about Katherine.

"There's something else too, the reason he wanted Kai to apologize to you so bad was that he could give him information about his and Stefan's mother."

"I know he just wanted to use me."

"No, quite the opposite actually, he thinks that their mother is the only person who can talk some sense into Stefan and get him to turn his humanity back on so he, in turn, could help Caroline, he just went about it the wrong way, typical Damon." I placed my face into my hand as I felt the familiar feeling of guilt washing over me again, man I was so acquainted with this emotion it'd soon become a permanent fixture.

"So can he come in." she asked, then rose from the bed and moved towards the door

" _Wait!_ He's here?" My heart went flying; it beat so fast I thought it was going to escape my chest. I was very sure Elena, and if Damon was outside the door for real, he heard it too.

* * *

Two knocks sounded on the door, and my eyes flashed in that direction. Elena opened the door, and there he stood, my eyes rose up to him, and I turned away, looking anywhere but him, the room seemed more interesting all of a sudden.

"I'm gonna give you guys a minute," Elena said, then disappeared before I got a chance to stop her. I sat there and waited for him to speak, but he didn't.

I slowly turn to look at him, as he moved more into the room and sat on the other bed, his eyes never left me, he didn't flinch or waver in his stare even though I caught him. A sigh escaped my lips when I realize I was going to have to start this.

"I'm sorry," I said, my voice sounded so timid nowhere near as firm as I thought it would be.

"Why are you sorry?" He asked his eyebrows doing that funny thing it always did.

"For yesterday." That was all he was getting out of me, I might have been a little harsh on him, but that didn't mean he didn't deserve it, and besides, that was our relationship we always exchange harsh words with each other, that was how we communicate.

"I'm sorry too; I'm sorry for not considering how you would feel, it's not something I'm used to when it comes to you." His eyes searched mine before roaming all over my face as if he was looking for something.

He did that a lot when we were in the prison world when we would sit and eat breakfast or dinner and even sometimes when I sat by the fireplace reading.

"This is like _deja vu_ for me." He said after a while.

"How so?" I asked, confused why he thought something like this had happened to him before.

"Before I realize I was in love with Elena, her friendship meant a lot to me, and after snapping Jeremy's neck without knowing whether or not he had on the Gilbert ring, I realized how much I valued our friendship after she threatened to end it." Hearing Damon talking about his friendship with Elena before knowing he loved her made my heart jumped, what was he trying to say.

"I don't want to lose you Bonnie period," he paused, he looked me in the eyes making sure I got the message.

"You mean more to me than you know." He continued, funny Jeremy said something similar earlier at lunch, what happened to me, did dying and coming back to life made me more attractive or something.

The crazy thing was when Jeremy told me he loved me; I felt nothing. I knew it sounded harsh, but that was how I felt, but when Damon said I meant more to him than I knew my skin caught fire and my heart went into overdrive.

There was this feeling in my chest, like an internal fire that kept blazing higher with every passing second. It was nothing like what I had felt for Jeremy, and I loved him, what I was feeling for Damon was so much more intense and dark, I couldn't explain it.

The way his look changed after that, I knew he saw when I went ablaze. Words failed me, whatever leftover anger I had for him dissipated. It was unfair. I could feel my mind trying to grasp whatever was, left of my anger but my heart was too strong this time, and I gave in.

The love that I tried so hard to bury for quite some time was now swimming to the surface, and I couldn't do anything about, even if I tried.

"Will you forgive me?" He rose from the other bed, and move to sit beside me, why would he do that? I had a feeling that he realized the effect he had on me, the control and power he could have if he tried a little harder.

Did you know hard it was to be mad at him? As much as what he did hurt me, I had to fight to stay firm; it took so much out of me. The level of anger it took to make it through that day. I had to do something. I couldn't be so weak.

I was a Bennett and a powerful witch. His eyes roamed over my face again before he attempted to brush a lock of hair out of my face.

Alarms went off in my head; I moved away so swiftly I lost my balance and almost fell backward off the bed. Damon's hand wrapped around my elbow and pulled me up almost into his lap, alarms still blaring, I pushed away from him and stood on feet that were wobbling all of a sudden, nerves rocking through my body.

"Um... Elena told me that you want to get your mother so, you can get Stefan back?" Could I sound any more pathetic, it seemed like anytime I got nervous around him I'd bring up Elena like she was a safeguard or something.

I didn't miss the smirk that appeared on his lips a sure sign that I was now in deep, deep shit, he had me and he knew it.

"I did not like the way you went about it," I started trying to sound brave and trying to ignore the butterflies fluttering in my stomach.

"I told you I didn't want to speak with Kai, but you brought him there _regardless_."

"I know, and I'm sorry, okay." He said rising from the bed and moving closer to me; I placed a hand up to stop him from coming any closer, knowing if he did I'd succumbed.

"I was too consumed by hurt and anger to hear you out before, at least now I know you had a reason for what you did, that's all you're gonna get."

"It's fine, I'll accept that it's not total forgiveness, but I'll work you up to that, although a hug would work nicely too." He said as a smile appeared on his face.

"Don't push it," I mumbled, trying to convince myself that I didn't want his body press against mine, of course, I did, his face looked a lot better than it did when he walked in fifteen minutes ago. "So we're good?" He asked once more.

"Yes, Damon, we're good.".

Elena chose that moment to enter a small smile on her face; I couldn't believe Elena thought it'd be best if she and Damon weren't together and he agreed just like that something was up but then again why was I even sweating myself about it.

If I liked, Damon wouldn't it be better if he wasn't involved with Elena? _NO IT WOULD BE VERY VERY BAD screamed my mind, should I listen?_

 **Author's Note:** **Wow, what a chap, poor Bonnie, she's fighting to keep herself from succumbing to Damon's charm. Hope you liked it.**


	5. Me, Myself and I

**AN: THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.  
**

 _"Yes, Damon, we're good."._

 _Elena chose that moment to enter a small smile on her face; I couldn't believe Elena thought it'd be best if she and Damon weren't together and he agreed just like that something was up but then again why was I even sweating myself about it._

 _If I liked, Damon wouldn't it be better if he wasn't involved with Elena? NO IT WOULD BE VERY VERY BAD screamed my mind, should I listen?_

 **CHAPTER FIVE: Me, Myself and I**

"If he tries anything, I will unleash everything I have, and I won't stop until he's dead, do you understand?" Damon finished his preparations and looked at me for a minute before he shook his head in agreement.

"Yep, sure I'll even hold him down for you."

"I'm not joking Damon!" I said, then folded my arms and looked him in the eyes, so he saw how serious I was being.

"Yeah, yeah, I know nothing's gonna happen, just let the psycho beg for your forgiveness and bring us to my mother and then we can go our separate ways," Damon said on his way to open the door. Kai walked in; looking around the room apprehensively.

His eyes fleeted to me, and he walked over to where I stood then he apologized for everything he did to me. I told him I accepted his apology though I never really did. It took every strength I had not to use my magic and choke him to death, just the sight of him made my blood boil more than Damon ever did.

A plan conjured itself inside my head as I watched Kai smile at everyone as if he belonged here as if everything that he'd done was rectified with a simple apology. I knew I shouldn't, but I just couldn't help myself the scars were too deep, and the emotional and mental pain still existed even if the physical pain was no longer there.

I wanted him to endure the same things I did, at his hand; he put me through so much, and I wanted him to suffer the same. I wanted him to feel every fear that I felt, the loneliness, the sadness and the scars that would haunt me perhaps all my life.

I wanted him to experience what I felt when I wanted to take my life, how it felt to be at the edge of sanity. No one to talk to and nothing to believe in; I wanted him to know how it felt to have no hope and to have that feeling for the rest of his life.

He was, after all, well acquainted with all those feelings since he had been there quite a long time now. I wanted him back at that same place, so I smiled at him and pretended that everything was fine.

I wanted him to feel safe until the freedom he had waited for, for so long was ripped from him and this time for good.

This, once I was not thinking about anyone else but myself, I had sacrificed more for others in these short years than any person would in a lifetime.

I never once thought about how it would affect anyone else if I left Kai there, in the 1903 prison world, only the satisfaction and the sweet feeling of revenge, a feeling that was so new to me.

The moment we entered the 1903 prison world the only thing on my mind was that only three people would be going home with me, and I made sure with everything in my power that, that was how it went

Abandoning Kai felt like nothing to me; I knew I should care, not about Kai, but the kind of person I had became that would do that. All I could think about as I left him there calling out to me was how hard it became to breathe as I locked myself in that garage, me on my birthday alone turning from left to right and no one there.

Those thoughts fueled me, changed me, and I realize I wasn't the same person I used to be. The time I spent in the prison had turned me into a different person, it made me realize how little I had valued my life, well that was all about to change.

I then knew that my life was precious, and I'd never again give up my life for anyone. I'd been protecting so many people, even some who couldn't die and left myself vulnerable, so no more.

I returned with the ascendant as planned and exited the 1903 prison with Damon, Elena and Lily Salvatore. Damon couldn't care less about Kai which made me felt even better about what I did.

* * *

"You don't have to leave; you can stay here, spend the night?" Damon asked as I moved towards the door. Elena had already gone, heading back to Whitemore.

"Um…... I don't think I should." The thought of staying here alone with Damon had me thinking things I shouldn't.

"And why is that, there's plenty of room here, you can choose anyone you like, including mine." My heart rate spiked, and a smirk appeared on his lips, he heard it; he was purposely toying with me.

"You know, that was a wicked move back there, leaving Kai in there like that." He said, with a smile on his lips.

"Yeah, well he deserved it."

"I thought so too; I'm sorry for what he did you." As he spoke, he moved closer to where I stood a couple of steps from the door and stopped in front of me.

"I already forgave you, Damon," I replied, looking up and getting caught in those two deep blue orbs of his. They were so beautiful, I'd never seen blue like that before, I wonder if it was a vampire thing.

"So, are you staying?" He asked again, as he leaned on the wall before the door, completely blocking my exit. I wanted to say yes, I mean nothing's going to happen right?

"Um…" That was my brilliant answer.

"Come on Bonnie you'll be home alone wouldn't you rather some company, it would be just like old times." A smile appeared on his face again as he took in my reaction, he was enjoying, watching me squirm.

"Fine Damon I'll stay but, I want the room furthest from yours." He raised an eyebrow at me as the smirk on his flawless face widen into a grin. The charge in the air was too much; our relationship was shifting too quickly, and I didn't know how to catch up.

This thing between us was getting out of hand, caught between wanting this so much and fearing it I didn't know what to do. It's Damon, we're talking about, I mean, why did I felt this intensely for him? I just didn't understand it.

The idea that he might share the same feelings, even the slightest bit towards me was preposterous. Damon and I were like oil and water, we didn't mix, it was just impossible.

We stood there staring at each other for what felt like hours. I was sure Damon recognized the shift in our relationship as I did, there was no hiding it, you could practically cut the tension with a knife.

We had already established that I was staying, I just had to move towards the stairs. I felt like I knew this place like the back of my hand. Damon's hand suddenly rose to my face.

I looked at it in alarm as I did when he did it the first time in Elena's dorm room. His fingers made light contact with my cheek, and a chill ran through me. His fingers were cold.

My eyes closed on their own, accord relinquishing in the feel of his hand on my skin. I felt when he moved closer to me as my skin prickled and his hand moved up into my hair. God, I wanted him to kiss me, I wanted to feel those lips on mine more than anything.

What was I doing? Did I even want to be involved with Damon? Was I ready for that? Troubling thoughts broke the spell that was, cast over me, and I pulled back, my eyes flew open and locked with his, that was the first time he touched me willingly; that didn't involve us fighting or him saving my life, but because he wanted to.

"Maybe I should go," I said after a while, not sure if I trusted myself to be here alone with him.

"I'm not gonna hurt you, Bonnie." He said, in my heart, I knew he wouldn't hurt me physically, but my mind knew there were other ways he could. As far as, I knew I felt a lot more for him than he felt for me.

I kept feeling that the only reason this was happening between us was that he couldn't have Elena and if something changed and Elena regained her memories, he would choose her in a heartbeat. I trusted Damon with my life; I trusted him to have my back in a fight and be there as a friend, but I just didn't know if I could trust him with my heart.

"You have before," I said.

"That was different." He replied a perplexed look appeared on his face.

"How were all the other times different." He raised both his hands to roam through his hair, something I'd never seen him do, must be a nerves thing.

"Well, I didn't feel what I feel for you now back then." I still couldn't shake the feeling that he was only doing this because he couldn't have Elena. The time that we spent in the prison world changed us, not just how we saw ourselves, but also how we saw each other.

We only had each other to depend on; feelings might have arisen because we were the only two people in there, well except Kai but he didn't count. What also kept nudging me was, would we had felt like we did, if we weren't trapped together, I didn't think so.

He would still be with Elena; there would be no reason for her to erase her memories and I would still be with Jeremy.

After carefully thinking about it, I started to convince myself that what we felt for each other might not be real, just the effect of us being alone together for too long so this time, my mind won, and I left.


	6. Seduction of the Heart

**DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.  
**

 _We only had each other to depend on; feelings might have arisen because we were the only two people in there, well except Kai but he doesn't count._

 _What also keeps nudging me was, would we feel like we do now if we weren't trapped together, I don't think so. Damon would still be with Elena; there would be no reason for her to erase her memories and I would still be with Jeremy._

 _After carefully thinking about it, I started to convince myself that what we feel for each other might not be real, just the effect of us being alone together for too long so this time, my mind won, and I left._

 **CHAPTER SIX: Seduction of the heart**

The walk to my car was just haunting. I kept going back and forth. I stopped twice and contemplated if I should turn around. I had this fear of giving in to my feelings and just telling Damon how I felt, but I still could not help the growing passion and lust that I felt for him too.

I made it to my car and stood at the door for a while before taking a deep breath and getting in. The drive home felt longer than usual, probably because I wanted to turn around at every corner.

When I did reach home, I sat in the car for almost an hour before I entered the house. I headed straight for the stairs removing layers of clothing as I went along until I was only in my bra and panties.

I stepped into the bathroom, hoping to get a long relaxing bath. I needed to be somewhere I could think, and the bath was the best place.

I removed my bra then tested the water with my hand seeing if it was warm enough as the tub continued to fill up. The doorbell rang, startling me and I paused bending over the tub.

I quickly grabbed a robe, wrapping it around my body then cautiously descended the stairs. Who could that be? I slowly walked up to the door and looked through the peephole. I felt my heart speed up until I heard it pounding in my ears.

It was Damon, turning my back to the door, I rose my hands to my chest and tried to slow my heart which I knew he could hear perfectly. I turned back to the door and pulled it open.

"Wha….. What are you doing here? I asked, a little surprised he followed me home.

"Well, you wouldn't stay at my house, so I've come to yours," he answered as I stood there, still staring at him.

" _Plus,_ we need to talk." He said, with a pensive expression on his face.

"Um…. about what exactly and since when do you knock, don't you usually appear somewhere inside?"

"Well, honestly I did, but I saw you about to take a bath so I didn't think It would have been a good idea….."

"What!" I shouted very tempted to slam the door in his face, I turned and walked into the living room, after a few steps. I turned back, looked at him and indicated that he could come inside.

"What do you want Damon and you better talk fast, I'm tempted to kick you out," I said as he walked in and closed the door. He looked over at me then he turned the lock on the door. I felt a chill.

I pulled the robe tighter over my body which quickly reminded me that, I was only wearing my panties underneath. My cheeks flushed when I realized Damon knew that too. I folded my arms over my chest self-consciously and asked again.

"What is it that you want Damon?" I tried to sound unaffected by his presence, but I failed miserably.

"I'm confused about what happen in the boarding house, you said you were going to stay, but then you left, why?" He asked looking at me expectantly and waited for an answer.

"I….. don't know I'm confused too, about everything," I said, my voice came out so small and weak, it surprised me.

" _Bonnie..._ " He whispered so softly I almost didn't hear him. He held his head down in his hands for a while. He looked conflicted I'd never seen him like that before. He then looked up at me with such an intensity that made me at a loss for words. He made a couple of quick strides to stand directly in from of me.

"I can't do this Bonnie." He said, shaking his head as he spoke, I was momentarily confused.

"I don't under-..."

"I can't stand this tiptoeing thing that we've been doing. I'm not very patient with this okay. I usually just take what I want and right now that's you. I realize tonight that I've been restraining myself from you all this time," Damon said piercing me with those blue orbs, speeding my heart up in my chest.

"I can't anymore, do you understand what I'm saying Bon?" He asked almost in a demanding tone that causes an ache to shot through me and settling in a place that shocked me. Desire flooded through my body that had me quivering with need. I didn't know Damon could induce such feelings within me and no matter how hard tried not to let it consume me I could not stop it.

"Damon… I….." his name escaped my lips in a whisper before I could stop it and he leaned forward automatically.

"Yes, tell me what you want, baby and I'll give it to you." He whispered, his breath mingling with mine, god I wanted him to kiss me, touch me. I wanted him to consume and devour me like I knew he could.

These feelings, coursing through me. They were raw, foreign and addictive. Damon's arms came around me to rest onto the back of the couch I was leaning on, trapping me. He hesitated above me gripping the couch tighter. He was holding himself back. I saw it on his face.

I knew he was waiting for something, a sign or movement that showed that I wanted him too, and then I'd never be able to stop him after that. He must have seen something because his head thrust forward so fast and captured my lips with his.

His hands, lifted off the couch to wrap around my waist, pulling me flushed to his body. Euphoria erupted inside me as I threw my arms around him completely lost in the sensation of his lips on mine. His tongue ran over my lips seeking entrance, and I was too happy to open my mouth to him. His tongue immediately dove inside and wrapped itself around mine. A moan escaped my lips as he sucked my tongue into his mouth.

My thighs-clutched together to control the ache between them, it was a pain I had felt before but never like this. I practically felt the moisture as it coated my panties.

The shrilling sound of the phone ringing in the distance lifted the cloak that was, thrown over us. I pulled away from his lips, regrettably. A frown appeared on his face as the phone stop ringing then started up again.

He moved away from me with a growl and pulled the phone from his pocket and answered. I released a breath I didn't even know I was holding and dropped my chin to my chest. I had just kissed Damon, and I liked it, I liked it a lot.

Damon continued talking on the phone, to whom I was not sure I assumed it was Stefan. I moved towards the steps hoping to get a cold shower now instead of the warm one I wanted earlier. I jumped as Damon appeared in front of me the phone to his chest.

"Where do you think you're going?" He asked, pinning me with that sexy stare of his.

"I'm ah... I'm going to take a bath you know, the one you interrupted earlier," I said still a little flustered from that kiss. His eyes slipped down to my robe for a while, and I unconsciously pulled it closer to my body. He gave me another lingering glance before stepping aside.

The cool water flowed over my body, snapping me out of the lustful haze that Damon had me in. He was laying down on my bed, sprawled out on two of my pillows as soon as I exited the shower.

"Are you gonna stand there and stare or join me?" He asked I looked at him skeptically, and he rolled his eyes and flipped over the bedspread for me to climb under the sheets.

"I'm not gonna steal your virtue, Bonnie….. at least not yet!" He said wiggling those eyebrows at me, shaking my head at him, I slid under the covers. He threw the sheets over me before pulling me into his arms which I didn't expect, but welcomed his embrace. We laid there for a while until he spoke.

"I won't go back to how things were between us Bonnie. I can't." He whispered.

"I wouldn't want us to," I whispered back suddenly, he pushed up onto his elbow hovering above me.

"There is no going back from this." He reminded me again. I replayed everything over in my head, everything in my life that had involved Damon and although there were some bad, okay a lot of bad. I couldn't find it in my heart to regret anything.

So I wouldn't fight this anymore, and I'd stopped using Elena as a safeguard to convince myself that I wasn't good enough, I took the risk.

"Okay," I said to Damon and myself, he appraised me for a while without saying anything his eyes darting all over my face. He then pulled me back into his arms and said.

 _"Good!"_

 **Author's Note** **Thank you guys for all your reviews, follows and fav. They all mean a lot, keep reading and I keep writing.**


	7. Ultimatums

**AN: THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.  
**

 _So I wouldn't fight this anymore, and I'd stopped using Elena as a safeguard to convince myself that I wasn't good enough, I took the risk._

 _"Okay," I said to Damon and myself, he appraised me for a while without saying anything his eyes darting all over my face. He then pulled me back into his arms and said._

 _"Good!"_

 **CHAPTER SEVEN: Ultimatums**

I woke to the sensation of feather light kisses on my neck and shoulders. My right blouse strap was all the down to my elbow. Damon was leaving lingering kisses on my shoulder blades going down to my back. I squirmed as he pulled my top even lower, exposing more of my skin to his lips.

"Damon! Stop it!" I breathe, his kisses heating up my body and prickling my skin. I pulled myself away from him and pulled my blouse strap back over my shoulder. I leaned back on the headboard and narrowed my eyes at me him.

He smiled and rolled his eyes at me; a laugh escaped my lips. I'd never seen Damon like this before; it was nice to know I brought out that side of him.

He looked so out of place in my room and even more so on my bed. I still couldn't believe what I was doing. I must, had been out of my mind.

"I didn't think you would stay all night," I said while picking at a ball of cotton on the sheets. I was nervous, and I didn't know why.

"Why wouldn't I, you are my 'girlfriend' now, aren't you?" He said making air quotes when he said the word girlfriend.

"I don't know, am I?" I replied in a playful manner, which brought another smile to his lips. I bit my lips as a smile threatened to spread across them as well. Inevitably, it did, and he laughed and moved closer.

He tried to kiss me, but I pulled back before he could. I realized that my morning breath must be just horrible. My hand flew to my mouth, and he pulled back too after seeing my actions.

"What's wrong?" He asked, confused by my reaction.

"Hold on a second," I said before moving from the bed to the bathroom, I quickly brush my teeth finally relieved that my morning breath was no longer an issue. I could not imagine kissing Damon like that.

I opened the bathroom door to head back to the bedroom but froze when I saw Damon leaning on the wall beside the door. Before I uttered anything he pulled me out into the hallway, grabbing my head, he pulled me to him. His lips plastered themselves to mine.

I moaned as his tongue slid between my lips to circle my tongue. His other hand slid around my waist and pulled me closer, and my arms looped around his neck. Kissing Damon was intense. He knew how to kiss, in other words. He was an excellent kisser, a lot better than Jeremy ever was.

Jeremy kisses were always so sloppy and inexperienced, not that I was any better. Damon, he knew when to dip, curve and stroke then he does a thrusting thing with his tongue that just Oh god, it makes me horny for lack of a better word.

Just like when he kissed me the first time I felt so turned on, that was how I felt that morning as his tongue continued to dance with mine.

After a while, his lips slowly withdrew from mine and moved to my cheek then my neck. He placed light kisses there before he pulled away. My head was still in a haze from that mind blowing kiss. I kept my eyes close and reveled in it a little while longer. Eventually, I opened my eyes to the grinning face of Damon.

"You looked, peaceful there." He said mockingly. He knew the effect he had on me.

"Oh, shut up, _you perv,_ " I replied, I tried to move around him, but he grabbed my waist and pulled me back to him, my back to his front. He bent down and whispered into my hair.

"You haven't seen nothing yet." A delicious shiver ran up my spine, leaving me leaning back more, into him. What was he doing to me? I'd never felt so wanton before. He ducked his head down into my neck again, sucking on my skin.

I leaned my head to the left, exposing more of my neck to him, he only sucked harder his teeth scraping against my neck. That immediately caught my attention. It came back to me that hey, Damon's a vampire.

I probably should be more caution about offering my neck to him. The thought of him feeding on me popped up in my head, but I quickly dismissed it. I pulled away from him, reluctantly, though.

"Your skin tastes so good," he said when I turned around to face him.

"Well! No one has ever said that to me before," I replied, with a chuckle, he smiled back at me before looking at his watch.

"You gotta be somewhere?" I asked.

" _I do,_ I'm meeting Stefan at the house." He answered.

"Oh, everything worked out with your mother?" I asked.

"Yeah, for once she does something right." he didn't bother hiding the disdain he had for his mother.

"You hate her that much?" I asked, wondering what she had done that could cause him to hate her like that, little did I knew he had every right to.

"Yep and there is no hiding it; I'll see you later." He swept down and gave me a kiss on the cheek before going down the hallway then down the stairs.

There wasn't much to do at my house except tidy up a bit. Afterward, I went over to Whitemore and signed up for a couple more classes. Stefan and Caroline were on their way back to their old selves thank God.

I didn't think I would have been able to handle another week with them. I never thought Caroline was capable of doing some of the things she did.

* * *

It was late in the afternoon when I return from Whitmore; I knocked on the door of the boarding house, but no one answered. I turned the lock seeing if was opened and it was. Slowly I pushed the thick door open and stepped inside.

"Damon?" I called, but no one answered. I walked into the living room and looked around. Clearly, there was no one here. I took out my phone, gave him a call while turning back to the front door. My heart nearly jumped up through my throat when I came face to face with Lily Salvatore.

"Hello, Bonnie." She said, a huge smile appearing on her face, so creepy.

"Oh my god," I said my hand going to my chest. "Didn't you hear me come in?" I asked, taking a step back from her.

"No I didn't, sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you." She said.

"It's fine; I'm alright," I replied, looking at her cynically as I moved and took a seat on one of the couches.

"I was waiting for my son Damon, but seeing as you're involved as well, I must ask. When will preparations be made to retrieve my friends?"

"Um….. I…. I'm not sure, " I said, unsure how to answer her question, I had no intention of going back to the 1903 prison world. I didn't know what kind of deal she had with Damon, but I was, done with those prison worlds.

"Not sure, huh," she said nonchalantly, then paced the floor a couple of times with a hand on her chin. "Well, that just won't do." She turned back to me, that same calm expression on her face but it wasn't the safe kind. More like a calm before a storm kind of look.

"Lily you're with your family now, you don't need to worry about that prison world anymore," I said, the expression on her face changed to one of rage so quickly.

"You know nothing about me or my friends. I was, promised that they would be, returned for and they will." She said I rose slowly to my feet seeing as she wasn't remaining calm, in case if need be to protect myself.

"I want the ascendant, and you're gonna get it for me. I've already done my part, now it's time to do yours, you will bring my friends back, and I'm not asking." She said before turning and walking out the door.

She had apparently lost her mind if she thought I was letting any of her Freakshow friends out into Mystic Falls.

I called Damon's cell a few times after his mother left but no answer, so I stuck around waiting for his return. I sat on the couch, thinking back to what Lily said, she was obviously serious about getting her friends back and with her being a vampire and apparently mental, which wasn't a good combination.

I just hope things could be dealt with quickly and without any casualties. The door burst open at that moment and to my surprise, Caroline walked in, as soon as she saw me sitting there she ran over to me and enveloped into a hug. She had apparently flipped on her humanity again.

"Oh Bonnie, this was how I should have greeted you, I'm so sorry for all the damage I've caused and the threats-..."

"It's okay; I'm just glad to have the old Caroline back."

"I think we should have a girls night tonight, you know, to catch up you, Elena and me. It's been so long since it has been just the three of us, so what do you say?" She asked, with excitement in her, that stirred my heart.

"Of course, let's do it," I replied, as she pulled me back into a hug my earlier worries were momentarily forgotten. I had decided to speak with Damon another time.

Caroline didn't waste time, she called Elena and told her about our girls night as soon as possible. She, of course, agreed and said she would meet us at my house.

All through the drive over to my house all I could think about was, should I tell Caroline and Elena about Damon and the fact that we were together.

I had no idea how they would react. Caroline, Elena and I use to tell each other everything, looking back all those years ago, we were so close before Stefan came then Damon, Katherine, and Klause.

Mystic Falls overflowed with all kinds of supernatural beings. Things were different. It was so hard to explain, but who we all were before, have transcended into being who we were meant to be.

I guess what I was trying to say was we had all been able to broaden our horizons and come out of our shells. I suppose that was at least something good to take away from all the bad.

Caroline pulled out all the snacks and drinks then threw all the pillows and sheets on the floor of my living room.

"This was a great idea Caroline; I needed this." Said Elena as she got comfortable on one of the pillows. I agreed, it has been too long.

"So let's get started Bonnie I have no idea how you got out."

"Well, thanks to Elena and of all people Damon, I got out magic from the rock on Silas's Island, Nova Scotia."

"Wow, I couldn't imagine, stuck in a world alone with Damon for so long, I mean, how many times did you guys wanted, to kill each other?" She asked.

"A lot of times, he got on my nerves every second of the day. But in all truth, I don't think I would have survived there as long as I did without him," I said, remembering all the times when he'd watch me read by the fireplace or made those pancakes every single morning.

He'd place a plate in front of me knowing how much I hated them. A smile lingered on my face just thinking about that mischievous little smirk he always had on his face every time he did it. I didn't even realize that both Caroline and Elena had stopped talking and were staring at me.

"What?" I asked a little embarrassed.

"You drifted off a little there with a very sweet smile on your face," Elena asked with a knowing smile.

"Who were you thinking about? Damon?" She asked then laughed, she said it in a joking manner that had even Caroline laughing, but would they had laughed if they knew the truth.


	8. The Cure

**AN: THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT. I MADE A FEW CHANGES TO ALL THE CHAPTERS, SO FEEL FREE TO REVISIT THEM.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.  
**

" _What?" I asked a little embarrassed._

 _"You drifted off a little there with a very sweet smile on your face," Elena asked with a knowing smile._

 _"Who were you thinking about, Damon?" She asked then laughed, she said it in a joking manner that had even Caroline, laughing, but would they had laughed if they knew the truth._

 **CHAPTER EIGHT: The Cure**

"Okay, so I have news for you guys," Caroline said ushering us closer. "I…. Ah, I slept with Stefan." She stated in a rush then cautiously looked over at Elena.

"What!" Elena asked, rolling her eyes. "Stefan and I aren't together anymore Caroline. It's okay." Caroline released a sigh of relief then squealed.

"Good, because I liked it, a lot!"

"Yeah, we get that you liked it," I said with a laugh. "I didn't even know you were interested in Stefan like that."

"I wasn't….. I mean I am now, oh, I don't know," she whined throwing her hands up, then bringing them to rest under her chin. "It was when had our humanities off. I don't know how he feels about it. We haven't talked about it since we revert to our usual selves."

" _Well,_ all I can tell you is, Stefan's a stand-up guy and very compassionate, I don't think he would have slept with you if he didn't want to," Elena said.

"No humanity Stefan is a lot different from the Stefan we're used to, trust me," Caroline replied.

Our girls night continued with a blast, we all had fun and by the time we fell asleep, I felt a little more like my old self again. The only thing that dampened my mood was that I didn't know how to tell them about Damon and me.

They had such strong, questionable feelings about him, and with Elena memories erased, she was back to thinking of him how she did when he had just arrived in Mystic Falls.

* * *

Caroline and Elena were making breakfast, while I packed up the pillows and sheets and brought them down to the laundry room. I pulled the cover off the basket and dumped them inside. I lifted another basket off the counter to make space and; it slipped a little in my hand.

My pants fell out, the one I on when I returned from the prison world. I had planned to throw it out because I didn't want anything associated those prison worlds around me.

I dropped the basket I had in my hand, then bent and took my pants off the floor. I felt something odd between my fingers. It was in my jeans pocket. I squeezed my hand together and felt an oval shaped object.

I quickly turned out the pocket, and the oval shaped container fell out into my hand. Oh my god, the cure. I must have pocketed it when I went to Nova Scotia. I forgot all about it; I turned the container filled with a red liquid over my hand.

Thinking back to all that we went through to get the cure, it was what started everything. It had been why Jeremy died in the first place. Caroline chose that moment to come barging in.

"Hey Bonnie I've been looking for you, breakfast's ready," She said, stepping further into the room, my first thought was to hide it, but she came around me before I could.

"What's that? Oh, my god! Is that the cure?" She asked in disbelief.

"Yes, I brought it back with me from Silas's Island in the 1994 prison world," I said, there was no use lying to her about it.

"So what are you going to do with it? Are you gonna give it to Elena?" she asked.

"I don't know,"

"What do you mean you don't know, all she has ever wanted was to be human again plus she would regain her memories of Damon, I'm sure she would want to decide for herself." She said, and her words hit me, she could get her memories back, of Damon. My heart twisted just thinking about it.

"Caroline I have to tell you something, it's about Damon and me," I said, grabbing hold of her arms and pulling her over to the washing machine that was turned on.

"You and Damon what could-... Oh no, please don't tell me that you guys, you know," She said an unsettled expression on her face, it kinda annoyed me.

"No, we didn't, but if we did, would It be so bad?"

"Bonnie! Do you even hear yourself, you're talking about sleeping with Damon, you, Bonnie Bennett, who hates Damon more than any of us."

"Yeah, well four months alone with someone can change your perspective of them," I said moving away from her.

"Oh Bonnie I'm sorry I'm just trying to understand," She said, then walked towards me and took my hands back in hers. "So what you're trying to say is what? You have feelings for Damon now?"

"Yes, Caroline and I think he feels the same too."

"Wow, that's a lot to take in, and I thought that finding out, Elena liked Damon was unbelievable, but this, wow this is just way beyond belief."

"Why is this so hard to believe?" I asked, perplexed by her words.

"Bonnie, trust me if this was reversed you'd understand, So are you gonna tell Elena? What about the cure? What are you gonna do Bonnie?" she fired questions at me.

"I don't know Care. I just feel messed up right now," I said, feeling already defeated, I knew that all Elena wanted was to be human again. What kind of friend would I be if I had a way for that to happen and didn't tell her about it?

Then again, I knew if did she'd have her memories back, and there was nothing I could do if Damon went back to her, which I couldn't help but feel that he would.

"We should head back upstairs, Elena might come looking for us," Caroline said.

"Sure," I replied, moving towards the stairs. "Bonnie?" Caroline's voice stopped me; I turned around and looked at her.

"I know things are complicated, but you need to do something, please don't let this get out of hand. I don't want you or Elena getting hurt, especially by Damon because that's what he does, hurt people." She said.

"He's not like that anymore Caroline," I countered.

"Hey, I'm just saying he has done a lot of bad stuff." She said shaking her head before climbing the stairs. I had released a stressful sigh before I followed slowly behind her.

* * *

I couldn't concentrate on anything else throughout the day, the cure in my jeans pocket haunted me every time I spoke with Elena. What was I going to do? It would be too selfish of me not to tell her about it. What about Damon? Should I tell him? What if he had second thoughts about us? Could I handle that?

"Bonnie, I think your phone's ringing," said Elena sitting beside me at the kitchen table. I snapped out of my thoughts and got up from the table. I went into the living room in search of my phone.

It stopped ringing when I found it beneath the couch cushion. The call was from Damon. I send him a text that I would meet him at his house.

"I'll see you guys later, okay," I said, grabbing my keys from the kitchen counter. "Where are you going?" Caroline asked giving me a pointed look.

"I'll be back," I mumbled before I quickly went through the door. Damn you, Caroline.

I pulled up at the boarding house half an hour later. I didn't bother knocking since I knew Damon was expecting me. He was sitting on the couch when I entered.

"Hey, what's up? I asked, moving to sit beside him. He turned his head to look at me then gave me a chaste kiss. A smiled graced my lips for the first time since finding the cure.

"What was that for?" I asked.

"Nothing, I just wanted to kiss you."He said, smiling sweetly at me. It felt right. How he looked at me, it gave me goosebumps. Would he still look at me like this if Elena had regained her memories?

"Hey, you okay?" He asked, pulling back from me.

"Um…... Yeah..I... I'm all right." I said as cheerily as I could, but doubting I sounded convincing, even to my ears. I seemed depressed.

"Are you sure?" He asked, looking patiently at me, his expression telling me he didn't believe me for a second.

"It's nothing okay," I said, standing from the couch. I felt wretched.

"Fine, fine, no need to get testy." He said, pulling me back to sit with him. "I have something to tell you, it's about my mother," he said.

"I know, she came to me yesterday demanding that I get her friends back," I said relieved to be talking about something else.

"What did she say to you?" He asked he looked upset by the idea that his mother spoke to me.

"She wanted the ascendant, and she wasn't nice about it, I don't know what kind of promise you made to h-..."

"Don't worry about it, those friends of hers will never set foot in Mystic Falls, I promise."


	9. Secrets and Lies

**A/N: THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.**

 _"What did she say to you?" he asked, he looked upset by the idea that his mother spoke with me._

 _"She wanted the ascendant, and she wasn't nice about it, I don't know what kind of promise you made to h-..."_

 _"Don't worry about it, those friends of hers will never set foot in Mystic Falls, I promise."_

 **CHAPTER NINE: Secrets and Lies**

I turned the oval shaped container over and over in my hand, watching the movement of the slightly viscous liquid inside. I bundled the sheets at my waist and sat up in bed. I was troubled, I couldn't sleep.

I took a peek at the window and saw that outside was still dark. I was still wide awake. I couldn't bring myself to fall back asleep, too much was on my mind.

My thoughts kept going back and forth, from Elena and the cure to Damon. These notions had been a plague on my mind since the moment I reached home. I spent all afternoon with Damon; the cure was in my pocket, and we were alone.

All I had to do was tell him the truth, but I didn't. Now I couldn't sleep. This little container held such significance; it could either make or break me, I didn't know which.

Why? Why did I let myself fall for him? It would have been so easy to give Elena the cure from the goodwill of my heart if I had not allowed myself to got roped in; To be charmed and seduced by the older Salvatore as so many had.

I thought I was stronger than that, but I got wheeled into the web that had already drawn in both Caroline and Elena. For years I've kept myself out of their love triangles, which only resulted in heartbreaks and death, especially to those completely innocent. Years ago, Damon was just another ally in keeping the town and the people I loved safe from others worse than him. But somehow he had wiggled his way into my heart and threw me off balance.

He was like an itch I couldn't shake, the more I scratched, the sweeter the feeling. He now occupied a vast space in both my heart and mind. My heart went into overdrive every time he touched me, and I couldn't stop thinking about him.

Whether I was asleep or awake, he was always at the forefront of my mind. His face, the way he smiled at me, how he'd whispered in my ear, the way my body came to life under his touch when he had kissed me it as if I was on fire.

I was hopelessly in love with him. My heart twisted at the realization, _what was I to do?_

I sat up in bed all night lost in thought. I didn't even realize when dawn arrived until the sun peeked through the window and I had to shield my eyes from the rays. I threw the sheets from me and swung my feet to the side of the bed.

I trudged to the bathroom still exhausted from my lack of sleep. I made quick work of my personal needs before I got dressed, grabbed my keys off the counter and went through the front door.

* * *

"Hey," Caroline greeted me as soon as I stepped out the car. "You look terrible, rough night?"

"Tell me about it," I replied, she fell into step with me walking up the concrete entrance of Whitmore.

"So have you decided what you're gonna do with the cure?" she asked.

"No Care, I still don't know what to do," I said still undecided. We entered the classroom a couple of minutes before the lecture began.

I had not seen Elena much that day, and I was grateful, I hated the guilt that threatened to consume me every time I saw her. My classes at Whitmore finished in the early afternoon. I sat in the car and pondered if I should tell Damon about the cure, what good would it do me if I kept it from him.

A shadow fell over my window, and I quickly thrust the cure in my pocket and looked up. I saw a guy from class waving his hand at me to roll my window down, so I did.

"Can I help you?" I asked.

"You're Bonnie Bennett right?" he asked instead.

"Who wants to know?"

"I'm sorry my name is Jesse we have a couple of classes together," he said, rubbing the back of his head a clear sign of nervousness. "I just wanted to invite you to this party in the dorms later," he said a hopeful expression on his face.

"What makes you think I'd want to go to a party?"

"I don't know you seem like someone who knows how to have fun," he said, my lips twitched, he saw and smiled at me.

"Come on, it'll be fun, I guarantee it," he stated in that same hopeful tone. A text came in on my phone at that point, and I held my finger up for him to give me a minute. I dug in my purse in search of my phone. It was from Damon saying he was on his way home if he could pick me up.

I shoot him a text saying I'd meet him at his house in an hour or so instead. I dropped my phone back into my purse and turned back to this Jesse guy so I could refuse his offer, but he was already gone. Huh?

Well, that was strange, I rolled my window back up, pushed the keys into the ignition and pulled out of the school parking lot.

Damon pulled me through the door and into his arms before I could even knock on the door. His face disappearing between my neck and shoulder. He nibbled on my neck before inhaling.

"I missed you, you've been on my mind all day, you didn't put a spell on me, did you?" he asked, but I had hardly heard a word he said, my mind was preoccupied with what he was doing to my neck.

"Would you be opposed to me biting you?" he asked, scraping his teeth across my skin. I never really thought about it, the last time he bit me he was trying to kill me. I wondered how different it would be if he didn't want to kill me. I felt terrified and a bit excited by the prospect. Wait! was I considering letting Damon bite me? Yes! Yes, I was.

"Well, I wouldn't say completely opposed, my interest in piqued," I said, he pulled back swiftly and looked at me.

"Really," he asked, he seemed surprised I was even thinking about letting him do it. He pulled me over the couch so fast and deposited me in his lap my legs widening over his waist. My lips immediately sealed over his, my mouth opened and took his tongue into my mouth.

A groaned left his lips as he hands gripped my waist pulling me closer. His lips left mine and moved to my neck. He pulled my hair around the other side, then start placing wet kisses on my neck, I moaned at the sensation.

"Can I?" he asked huskily, and I quickly nodded my head in agreement. My heart pounded in my chest when I felt his fangs elongated on my skin. A shiver ran through me, then a pinch of pain when his teeth sank into my skin.

One of his hands went up to grasp my neck turning it to the side for better access while his other hand grabbed onto my ass squeezing me more into the erection I felt forming in his pants.

I felt my panties dampen as he continued grinding me down unto him, _my god_ , who would have thought having Damon fed on me would turn me on so much. I practically felt my blood flowing out my body and into his.

A few seconds later he pulled his teeth from me and started lapping at my neck, rubbing his tongue over the wound and the excess blood running down. I continued to grind down onto his erection; gasps of ecstasy escaped me at the sensation. Soon we were both grinding, chasing the high; I was right there his jean button was rubbing right on my clit.

We both got lost in each other, absorbed in the feelings we evoked with our actions. Suddenly Damon stopped his movements and pulled back. I was so close to coming. I opened my eyes and looked at him, but his head was, turned to the front door. I quickly snapped my head in that direction and saw the shocked stance of Stefan by the door.

I tried to remove myself from Damon's lap, but he wouldn't let me go. I felt mortified; Stefan was still standing by the door frozen in disbelief.

"Brother? You mind giving us some privacy?" Damon asked nonchalantly at Stefan, who then shook his head and blinked at us.

"Um…... I... excuse me," he said before he clumsily went back out the door.

"Finally! I thought he would never leave, now where were we?" Damon asked, but I was no longer in the mood.

"Damon I... _oh my god_ we should have gone up to the bedroom," I said, trying to pull his hands from my waist.

"Come on Bonnie," he whined when he saw that there was no way we could continue since we were interrupted. Scrambling of his lap, I ran my fingers over the two small holes in my neck checking for blood, but there was none. I grabbed my purse off the floor; then moved towards the door laughing at the expression on his face.

"I'll see you later," I said on my way out the door. Stefan stood by his car went I came out the house. I kept my head down as I moved quickly to my car. I jumped in and left as fast as I could. I couldn't imagine the conversation they were having now.

* * *

I still had a smile on my face when I pulled up at my house half and hour later. Nightfall was approaching, and I wanted to go over some papers from school before I went to bed. I pulled the keys out and made my way up to the porch.

The smile slipped from my face when I saw a figure standing by my door. I stopped short when the person stepped forward. It was Lily Salvatore, why wouldn't the woman leave me alone?

"Bonnie, I've been waiting for you," she said, a smile played on her lips. "I don't have the ascendant and even if I did, I wouldn't give it to you," I said, I folded my hands over my chest and narrowed my eyes at her.

"Is that so?" she asked with a smirked that confused me. "I think you should consider your options very carefully Bonnie,"

"What options?" I asked baffled.

"It's like this. You can either get the ascendant and meet me, at the crept tomorrow, or I'll just have to tell Damon and Elena about the secret you've been keeping from them," she said observing her hand in boredom.

"I'm not keeping anything from them," I said, annoyed and suspicious, she couldn't be talking about what I thought she was, could she?

"You don't? So you don't have the cure, then?" she said, she examined my reaction and smiled.

"How do you know about that?" I asked, perplexed and nervous about the situation.

"I have my ways; I have people spying on you," she said. "So do we understand each other?"

"How stupid do you think I am?"

"Pretty stupid, I wonder what Damon will think when he finds out you had the cure all this time, and poor Elena, who wants nothing more than to be human again but can't because you're selfish and jealous of her."

"What! I... why would I be jealous of her?"

"I don't know Bonnie, you tell me, scared Damon will go running back to her. It's your call. I'll see you tomorrow." Lily Salvatore disappeared before my eyes, and I was left alone in the dark feeling incredibly stupid and angry at myself.

 **A/N Hey guys, so I have news, this month I have some big events coming up, I'll be very busy, so I won't be able to post every week as I normally do. I will try not to keep you guys waiting for too long, so just bear with me. I'll update as soon as I can.**


	10. Revelation and Auguish

**A/N: THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.**

 _"What! I... why would I be jealous of her?"_

 _"I don't know Bonnie, you tell me, scared Damon will go running back to her? It's your call. I'll see you tomorrow." Lily Salvatore disappeared before my eyes, and I was left alone in the dark feeling incredibly stupid and angry at myself._

 **CHAPTER TEN: Revelations  
**

I fumbled with my keys trying to get the front door open. I was such an idiot. Finally pushing the door open, I stepped inside while pulling the phone from my pocket.

Dialing Elena's number, I brought the phone up to my ears, it rang a couple of times before going to voicemail. _Shit!_ I dialed again, and it rang but still went to voice.

I threw the phone onto the couch in frustration and ran a hand through my hair. I couldn't allow Lily to get the ascendant, so I had to tell Elena about the cure. I couldn't believe I allowed the situation to escalate into this.

I should have offered the cure to Elena as soon as I found it. I should have told Damon about it and allowed him to decided who he wanted to be with; I should never have kept it from them.

The prison world had changed me more than I had thought. I was never the kind of person who would have done something like that. My eyes prickled with tears and heart pounded in my chest just thinking about what Elena and Damon would think of me.

I pulled the doors open and ran down the porch steps to my car. I was planning to tell them everything. If Damon chose to be with Elena again, I'd just had to accept it and move on. _But could I really, do that?  
_

I pulled out of my driveway and onto the main road heading towards Whitmore's campus. My hand drifted down to the cure in my jeans pocket. Why didn't I left this stupid thing on Nova Scotia? _You knew you couldn't_ my mind said, and it was true, I'd felt even more guilty if I did.

Deep down I knew Elena would have wanted to be human again. I knew she'd never expect I'd brought it back for her, but she knew that was the type of person I was. I was concentrating so hard on what I had to tell Elena that I didn't saw the car coming from the side until It collided with mine.

My head was pounding, my body ached all over, and My body felt as if it was in an awkward position. I groaned when my eyes opened, I looked around and saw that my car was, overturned into the forest. I was upside down in my seat.

I reached up and managed to unlock my seatbelt then tumbled onto my shoulder on the inside roof of the car. A moan slipped from my lips when pain shot through my arm. I bit my bottom lip and shifted from my shoulder then crawled out through the broken window. I somehow managed to get onto my feet, with a limp. There was blood streaming down my leg, and my side hurt like hell.

 _Who the heck crashed into me?_ I slowly hopped up to the main road, hoping I'd find some help. The energy was leaving me fast, and blood was pouring from my leg profoundly. I waited helplessly for a car to pass by before I probably died from blood loss. I was at the tip of passing out when I saw a car light. I cooped for a few more seconds and saw the car slow down in front of me, but I didn't saw who came out.

* * *

I heard beeping and smelt the distinct scent of a hospital.

"She's waking up guys," I listened to the familiar voice of Caroline, then heard footsteps coming into the room. Someone held my hand then I felt lips brushing against the back.

"Bonnie can you hear me?" asked the voice of Damon, slowly I open my eyes, and was met with those familiar blue orbs.

"Damon?"

"Yes I'm here,"

"What happened?" I looked around the room and saw Caroline, with Stefan standing behind her followed by Matt then Elena. They were all staring at me and also shifting their eyes to Damon who held my hand in his.

"I was hoping you would tell us that," said Caroline stepping forward and sitting on the bottom of the bed. "Matt found you on the road a couple of miles from your house, you lost a lot of blood, and you were unconscious." I frowned in confusion as I tried to remember what had happened.

"We found your car in the woods, It seemed like another car hit you but there was no sign of it," Matt said stepping forward. Suddenly I remembered, another vehicle did hit me, it came out if nowhere.

"A...a car came from the side of the road..a...and hit my car, I remember waking up. I hurt so bad I...managed to get up to the road but then nothing after that," I said, while looking at the window and saw that it was daylight. I had been there all night.

"You think this was a simple car accident or was someone trying to hurt you?" Stefan asked, Damon squeezing my hand in his and a frown appeared on his face.

"But who?" asked Elena.

"Someone like my mother," Damon said, his face hardening.

"Why would our mother want to hurt Bonnie?" asked Stefan, he seemed perplexed by the idea.

"Because she wants the ascendant to release those _so called_ family of hers," Damon said his voice laced with anger, "We can't let that happen," I pondered through my thoughts trying to remember where I was going when I had the accident or was attacked or whatever. My thoughts were jumbled, but I knew it had something to do with the cure. _Oh right,_ I was going to tell Elena about it. I looked around the room for my belongings since I was only wearing a hospital gown.

"We are my clothes and stuff?" I asked.

"Oh I'll get them for you," Caroline said leaving the room, soon after a nurse came in and said I should get some rest. Damon said he'd stay with me to the shock of Matt and Elena. I had forgotten that they didn't know about us. Everything happened so fast with Damon and me. We didn't even get a chance to talk about how we were going to tell everyone about our new found relationship.

Since Matt was the one who had found me, he had to bring me to the hospital, so I had no vampire blood in my system. Caroline came back as everyone was leaving the room.

"Bonnie, your stuff they aren't there,"

"What do you mean?" I asked, wondering who could have snatched my clothes and bag.

"I'll go check back to where you had the accident, maybe your bag fell out of the car?" Matt replied. Everyone filtered out of the room with promises to visit me later. Damon sat down at my bedside with my hand still in his.

"You scared the shit out of me judgy." he said.

"I know, sorry, I'll be more careful when I get out."

"You won't be going back to that house by yourself. You know that right?"

"What! _Why?_ "

"Bonnie, you're in the hospital, when Matt found you, you were within an inch of your life. You lost a lot of blood I...I don't know what I'd do if I lost you, Bon." He squeezed my hand then brought it up to his lips. "My mother has something to do with this I just know it."

"So what you gonna be my bodyguard or something?"

"Yep, from now on, you're not staying home alone, either I stay at your house with you or you move into the boarding house,"

"I won't leave my home Damon,"

"Well then I'll move in with you,"

"Damon-..."

"Don't argue with me Bonnie, please," I heaved a sigh and agreed with him, we sat there for a while, then my eyes dropped, and my body seemed like it would soon shut down. Damon noticed this and said.

"I'll come back and give you some of my blood later, so you can get out of here without too much suspicious, I have to go find my mother."

"Wait Damon! There's something I have to tell you," I fought to keep my eyes open, as wariness flooded through my body. I felt sleep trying to pull me under as I sought to tell him about the cure.

"Don't worry Bonnie I'll be back. Get some rest," he replied then bent down to kiss me on the forehead. That's the last thing I had saw before I succumbed to unconsciousness.

* * *

 _"Oh Bonnie, wake up,"_ a disoriented voice sounded in my ears. My head veered to the side trying to see who it was.

"Caroline?" I asked as I started to gain consciousness.

"Nope, not Caroline, it's Lily," my eyes snapped open, and I saw her standing at the side of my bed.

"How did you get in here?" I asked narrowing eyes at her.

"Well, I was hoping you would be at the crypt to bring back my family. But it seems, I was wrong about you. You had chosen to tell Elena and Damon about the cure instead,"

"How do you know that?"

"I told you, I have people watching you, now I'm gonna give one last chance. Where is the ascendant?"

"Forget it, Lily, your freaky family is never getting out," she laughed then moved closer to where I laid in bed.

"You know, that car crashed could have been more devastating, I can't harm you because you are the only one powerful enough to bring my family back. But if you won't do it _willingly_ , I'm just gonna have to find other ways for you to cooperate." she moved from the bed and walked back to the doorway. She then turned around and dropped my bag on the table by the door.

"My bag," I said as she walked out through the door. Why did she have it? I needed to call Damon and tell him everything now. I rose from the bed groaning in pain as I slowly placed my legs to the side of the bed. Gently I lifted and tried making my way over to the table that had my cell phone. As soon as I reached for the bag, Damon came into the room.

"Hey, hey what are you doing, get back to bed," he said moving towards me. The bag was already in my hand, and as soon as I lifted it, all the contents of my bag fell to the floor. My phone, a book, a pen, some lips gloss, a few other personal belongings then finally, cure that rolled and stopped right in front of Damon. My heart pounded in my chest, and my throat tightened.

"Is that what I think it is?" he asked in a whispered voice. Slowly he bent down and picked up the oval container in his hand. I couldn't find the words to answer his question. My skin covered in goosebumps from fear of what he did next.

"You had it, all this time, from the beginning? He asked again, looking up at me, his face was hard to read. I couldn't tell what he was thinking.

"No, I….I d...didnot, I f….found it a few days ago Damon, I…...I'm sorry, I should have told you about it I…." my voice quivered as I stammered through, trying to find the right words. He remained silent for quite some time. I waited for him to say something, anything but he didn't. He stared at the cure, then looked up at me again.

"Why didn't you tell me about it?" he asked his tone unreadable.

"I don't know," I answered pathetically, tears brimming from my eyes.

"Does Elena knows?" he asked, and my heart twisted at the mention of her name.

"No,"

"So you weren't planning to tell us about it," he asked, an annoying tone laced to his voice, he was getting angry, and that wasn't a good sign.

"I was going to tell yo-..."

"When?" he asked, bristly.

"I-..." my sentence was cut off by the door opening and the last person I wanted to see walked in, Elena.

"Bonnie, I have to talk to you ab..." Elena started then stop when she saw me, my face tear stained and my purse contents were lying on the floor with Damon standing in front of me.

"So it _true?_ " she asked and my body almost crumbled in anguished she knew, Lily had told her.

"You had the cure all this time," Elena said, a disappointed look on her face as she stared at Bonnie. "Lily Salvatore had to tell me about it, Bonnie how could you, I thought we were friends?"

"Elena I…." I didn't know what to say to her. I turned back to Damon his face had a mixture of emotion were running across it, that I couldn't pinpoint. He looked from the cure to Elena then me and snapped his eyes shut and squeezed the cure in his hand. He suddenly pulled my hand in his and placed it in my palm.

"I need a drink," he stated before brushing past Elena and slipped through the door. I gasped at his quick departure and couldn't help but think this was the end. I turned back to Elena who was still there.

"I was going to give it to you last night, Elena; I was on my way to Whitmore when I got into the accident. I think Lily sent the driver who hit me; she wanted me to help her get her so called family back." I said in a rush, the truth pouring out of me.

"Why last night? She told me you had the cure for some time now, how did she even know about it?"

"She has people watching me; that's how she found out I had it,"

"Why didn't you say something as soon as you found it, Bonnie? I don't understand,"

"I was stupid okay, Damon a...and I are well I don't know _were_ to...together," she stood and stared at me before turning and making a quick departure as well.

 **Author's Note: This chapter didn't go how I wanted it to, but ah well. Keep reading and I'll keep writing. Until next time have a nice weekend**.


	11. My Blood, Your Blood

**A/N: THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.**

 _"Why didn't you say something as soon as you found it, Bonnie? I don't understand,"_

 _"I was stupid okay, Damon a...and I are well I don't know were to...together," she stood and stared at me before turning and making a quick departure as well._

 **CHAPTER ELEVEN: My Blood, Your Blood**

My leg hurts like hell but still I hopped my way back to the bed. The pain in my leg, my side and practically all the aches over my body were nothing compared to the pain my heart endured. My face was, stained with tears, and I could barely breathe.

Slowly and with a wince I climbed back on the bed and laid flat on my back. I stared up at the decayed ceiling and grimace as a flash of Damon's face appeared in my mind. Was this it? I thought, Damon and I had barely been together, and we were over already?

It was all my fault. I ruined everything just like that. All I had to do was tell Elena and Damon about the cure. It wasn't that hard. Why? _Why?_ Did I kept it from them; I lost everything _anyway_. I turned to face the door hoping he'd walk through, but I knew it was just wishful thinking.

He said he needed a drink that meant that he won't be back for a while, if ever. My eyes brimmed with tears again that flowed down the side of my face and to my ears. Frustratedly I wiped them away. Furious with myself and my stupidity. I allowed Lily to play me, fooled me and she won in such a simple game.

A knock on the door caught my attention, and I turned and saw my mother leaning on the wall just inside the room. All of a sudden, I was overcome with emotion.

"Mom?" I said as my voice cracked, and tears continuously flowed down my face. She gave me a sad smiled.

"Oh Bonnie," she said, before she pushed off the wall and walked over to my bed.

"How did you know?" I asked curious to know how she knew I was in the hospital.

"Your friend Caroline called me, thought I should be aware that my daughter was in an accident." she said giving me a pointed look that expressed her displeasure about my condition.

"I'm sorry," I said as she moved closer.

"No, no you don't have to be sorry, it's okay," she said taking my hand in hers and giving it a little squeeze. "Tell me what's going on, I tried contacting you, but I couldn't get in touch with you," that must have been the nearly six months that I was dead.

"Oh Mom it's a long story but ah the root of it all i..is that I found the cure to vampirism and I was selfish with it," I said in a quiet voice still angry with myself.

"Honey I've accepted this, I'm okay with being what I am,"

"I know _you_ are but my friend ah.. Just talking about it hurts,"

"It's okay you are obviously in pain and tired why don't you get some rest,"

"I don't think I can,"

"Try, please, I won't be far," she said moving to the door.

I shifted on the bed to get comfortable and laid there for a while before closing my eyes and relinquishing to sleep.

* * *

The room was empty when I woke up. Outside showed that I had been asleep for a while. The door then suddenly push open, and my mother walked in.

"I thought you'd be on your way back home by now?" I asked her as she moved further into the room.

"I don't wanna leave you like this Bonnie,"

"I'll be okay mom Da-...I..I mean Caroline will be coming later to take me home?"

"You sure you're gonna be alright?"

"Yes thanks for coming,"

She left half and hour later, after giving me a speech about being more careful. I reached over to the bedside table for my phone to call Elena. I needed to speak with her and rectify everything, or I'll never be in peace. The phone rang for a few seconds, and I thought it would go to voicemail but on the last ring I heard her voice answer on the other end.

"Elena I know that we aren't in a good place right now, but I was hoping we could talk," I said then waited patiently for her answer.

"Bonnie I….I don't know if I want to see you right now," I could hear the sadness in her voice and guilt began to rise in my gut.

"I understand and Elena I _am_ very sorry, I know all you've ever wanted is to be human again, and I kept that from you. Just know that the cure is yours if you still want it,"

"I do Bonnie I…..just I...I might not be happy with you right now but….you know what I'll be there right after class okay," Elena said with a sigh, I too release a sigh of hope that we might be able to talk things through.

"Thank you, Elena,"

After ending the call with Elena, I tried calling Damon, but it went straight to voicemail every single time. It seemed as if he was deliberately rejecting my calls. I was at a loss on what to do in regards to Damon. What could I do to make amends with him?

Matt came by at one point giving me details about the crash sight. He told me he thought he found the car that crashed into my car about 50 miles from where the accident took place. No one was inside, but he said they were still looking.

I thanked Matt for his help. I withheld the information about Lily simply because I didn't want Lily targeting anyone else just to get back at me. Matt was the only human friend I had. Unlike Caroline and Elena, Matt wasn't supernatural if he got killed that's it. And I would never forgive myself.

Elena arrived 45 minutes later. She seemed apprehensive just entering the room. I sat up a little straighter at her entrance. I was grateful she was here.

"Hey," she said walking over to the bed.

"Hey," I replied, "Um thanks for coming."

"Yeah well I almost didn't,"

"I'm glad you did, even though I wouldn't have blamed you." I twisted the hospital band around on my hand trying to focus on what I should say.

"Elena I…..I'm sorry if I made you feel betrayed or confused about our friendship, that wasn't my intention,"

"Then what was your intention Bonnie?" she asked sitting on the bed beside me.

"I brought the cure back from the 1994 prison world, and I had every intention of giving it to you, I j..just don't know what happened," I swallowed the lump in my throat and organized my thoughts.

"I know I left earlier b..but I just couldn't process what Lily told me and the way Damon was frantic after hearing what happened to you," I watched as Elena heaved a sigh then continued.

"The way he held your hand when you were unconscious. I just didn't know Damon had a side of him like that I was overwhelmed," Elena lift her eyes to meet mine and I could see the wheels turning in her head. I didn't exactly know what she was getting at.

"Elena-..."

"You said that you and Damon were together, I...what did you mean?" she implored me with her eyes to explain, but I had a feeling she knew exactly, what I meant.

"Well, we spend some time in the prison world getting to know each other, and I.. I don't know, I think I fell for him," I watched her reaction trying to see how she would take it.

"He told me he felt for me the same way I feel for him, so..."

"..- You guys got together," she concluded, her face was held down from me looking at her hands on the bed. "When did this happen?"

"About a week or two ago we didn't get a chance to sit and talk about everything,"

"Oh," We sat there in silence for a while, I didn't know what to say to her, and I guess she didn't know what to say either. After a while, I reached for the cure on the side table and held out my hand to her. She looked at the object in my hand then to my face then slowly, took it from my hand.

"I'm sorry I kept it from you," I said as she turned the cure over in her hand.

"Take it if you want or not I don't care what you do with it, It's your choice."

"Don't your mother want it?" My lips lifted into a sad smile just thinking about her.

"Uh no she ahh has gotten comfortable being a vampire and want to stay that way, so it's all yours."

Okay um thanks, I guess,"

"Yeah," We slipped back into silence, and it wasn't a silence that I was used to. I don't think there was ever a time that I've ever felt awkward around Elena. We've known each other for a long time, and it was the first time I had no idea what to say to her.

"I ah I have to go," Elena said after a while rising from the bed and moving to the door.

"Yeah I understand, thanks for coming," She walked over to the door and pulled it open then stopped in surprise. She came face to face with Damon. I also was surprised to see him; I watched as Damon and Elena stared at each other, and I felt like an intruder watching their interaction. My heart fell to the pit of my stomach forcing me to turn my face away.

"I ah I'll leave you guys to it," I heard Elena said after a few more seconds then slipped out through the door. Damon closed the door behind him and walked over to my bed.

"Hi," I said my voice barely above a whisper.

"HI," He said back in the same tone.

"I didn't think you'd come back, I….I thought that-..." The words got caught in my throat. I didn't want to say it, afraid it might be true.

"I'm still upset with you, but I couldn't leave you here. I came to give you my blood and take you home,"

"Caroline could have done that," I said hoping he was here because he still _want_ ed to be with me.

"I don't want anyone else's blood in your system but mine," he said, and I scoffed at him, unable to see his logic.

"Um O...kay," he chuckled then came closer while biting into his wrist.

"Come on, let's get you home."

 _ **Author's Note: Hey guys, sorry for the wait. I hoped you enjoyed it.  
**_


	12. Decisions, Decisions

**A/N: THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.**

 _"I'm still upset with you, but I couldn't leave you here. I came to give you my blood and take you home,"_

 _"Caroline could have done that," I said hoping he was here because he still wanted to be with me._

 _"I don't want anyone else's blood in your system but mine," he said, and I scoffed at him, unable to see his logic._

 _"Um O...kay," he chuckled then came closer while biting into his wrist._

 _"Come on, let's get you home,"_

 **CHAPTER TWELVE: Decisions, Decisions**

I grimace at the taste of blood flowing down my throat; I can't even imagine having to live off this stuff.

"How do you feel?" Damon asked as he removed his arm from my lips. "Better," I replied sitting up and moving my legs to the side of the bed.

"Good," he said gathering my belongings from the table and walked around the room nonchalantly. His indifference was bruising whether he was pretending or not. "Damon, I'm sorry," I whispered to his back. He stops moving for about a minute. I watched him as he stood there not saying anything. A minute later he resumed what he had been doing as if I hadn't said a word. His voice surprised me a few moments later.

"I don't want to talk about this right now," he said dropping a bag with clothes in my lap then moving to the door.

"Get, dress," he slipped out through the door without saying another word or even looking back at me. I released a pained sighed and rose to slip on my clothes. He returned fifteen minutes later with a sandwich and coffee. He placed them on the side table then turn to me and said.

"You should eat, then I'll take you home," he face was expressionless, I didn't know how to approach him.

"And after, can we talk?" I asked, hopefully, he must still care if he was here right? I mean why else would he had come back.

"I don't know," he murmured, turning away from me, why does he do that?

"Damon, please don't be like this," I moved closer, wanting to be in his presence. I missed him, something I didn't expect. I didn't know what to do to earn his trust again.

"I….-"

"I'll be outside when you're ready," he said abruptly before moving swiftly to the door. I choked a sob at the closed door. I tried to compose myself, but it was so hard. How do I bounce back from this? How do I get him back? Why was he even here? _Because he still cares!_

I took a deep breath and gathered my things. I couldn't eat so I packed the food in my bag, but the coffee I needed. I opened the door and stepped out of the room I'd been in for almost three days now. Damon was leaning on the wall beside the door, his face a look of complete bewilderment. He kicked off the wall when he realized my presence. I wondered what he could have been thinking about so thoroughly.

"Are you ready?" he asked.

"Yes," I murmured before moving down the hall, we stopped at the desk to finish up the release paperwork before we exited the hospital. The drive home was quiet. There was tension in the air that I couldn't pinpoint. I looked over at him; his features looked tense.

I'd never seen that side of Damon before; he was quiet, unresponsive and that scared me. Damon had always spoke his mind whether he was happy, hurt, confused, angry and even when he was torturing people. He vocalizes what he feels, but now he was the total opposite. I didn't know how to deal with a rational Damon.

My phone started to ring, and I dug through my bag to retrieve it. Caroline's name flashed across the screen.

"Hey Care," I said, actually happy to break the deafening silence in the car.

 _"Hey Bonnie, I was just wondering if you'd like some company when you reach home. Damon told me he was picking you up. I wanted to do it, but he rudely insisted,"_ I smiled at the thought of Damon and Caroline arguing about which to bring me home.

"Yeah sure, Caroline,"

" _Great, I'll see you soon,"_

We pulled into the driveway of my house about twenty minutes later. He got out of the car then pulled my bag over his shoulder; I followed behind him in silence. He walked me up to the porch but hesitated at the door.

"You know you can come in, right?" I said walking passed him and up to the door to unlock it.

"Yeah I know," he said but didn't make any attempted to cross the threshold.

"Why didn't you tell me about the cure?" he asked abruptly.

"I… don't-"

"No! I need an answer Bonnie; I need to know why you had such little faith in me. I told you I wanted to be with you and there was no going back. I meant it. yet, you didn't trust me enough to tell something so simple,"

"Simple? It wasn't simple Damon. I spent four months with you. I had to endure four months of you talking about Elena. Four months of you saying she is the love of your life, all the while I was slowly getting acquainted with you. Getting to know you, the real you," my voice ended with a tremble but I couldn't stop, every insecurity that I've felt since the day we got together was flowing over.

"I started to see why no matter what you did Stefan never gave up on you because he saw the good you try so hard to hide from everyone," I continued unable to look at him anymore afraid of what I might see.

"I saw how devasted you were when you found out Elena erased her memories of you."

"What does Elena have to do with us?"

"Everything!" I said in exasperation, overcome with emotion and tears started spilling from my eyes.

"How could I have known that you wouldn't immediately choose her over me like you always have?" How could I have known Damon?"

"By trusting and having faith in me," he said.

"I trusted Jeremy an..-"

"Don't compare me to baby Gilbert, I'm nothing like that." he seemed insulted that I even brought Jeremy up, and perhaps I shouldn't have but I was hurt and confused and already felt so guilty about keeping the cure from him. Damon turned his head down to the driveway then turned back to me and sighed.

"I have to go," he said turning back to the driveway, it was getting dark already.

"But we're not finished," I said following him down the porch steps. Just then Caroline pulled up waving at me from the window. I dried my eyes and gave her a weak smile. She stepped out of the car and moved up the walkway to where Damon and I stood.

"Bonnie your eyes are all puffy, What you say to her?" She twirled on Damon with her hands on her hips. Damon had rolled his eyes before he said.

"Bonnie and I, are none of your business blondie," he continued to his car ignoring Caroline replies. I signaled for Caroline to stop talking before following Damon to his vehicle.

"We've only just begun Damon, Can we get pass this?" I asked blankly, I needed to know where we stood.

"Yes because I want us to," he said, before getting into his car. "How long will be punished for this?" I asked warily watching his expression.

"Until I say so," his lips lifted into a small smile through the window. Hope surged in my heart as I watched his car turn onto the main road and disappear from view.

I turned and walked back up towards my house. My heart was beating hard in my chest. I felt hopeful that I still had a chance with Damon, even though he was cryptic in his wording. Caroline had already gone in, I pushed the door open and stepped inside.

"Caroline?" I called moving further into the house; a phone rang coming from the living room, and I walked inside. Caroline purse and phone was on the table but no Caroline. I picked up her phone that was ringing and answered.

"Hello?"

"Bonnie? Is that you?" it was Elena, she sounded _different._

"Hey Elena, um Caroline disappeared on me,"

"Oh, you're home?"

"Yeah, I got back about an hour ago,"

"That's great I ah….um I was calling to tell her that I ah.. took the cure," I paused in my response to take in what she had just said. She took it; I didn't know what to say or feel really.

"Good for you Elena, I know how much you've wanted your humanity back." that was harder to say than I expected, my buoyant mood earlier dampen just a little bit.

"Thanks, Bonnie, so ah tell Caroline for me okay,"

"Yeah, I will," we both paused for a few awkward minutes before we hang up. I released a sigh I didn't even realize I was holding until I removed the phone from my ear. I was still a little stunned by the news that Elena was human again when I went in search of Caroline.

"Caroline?" I called but no answer, it was so strange, I turned the corner heading into the kitchen and gasped when I saw Caroline sprawled out the floor. I tried to reach for her but was thrown back and crashed into the table in the middle of the room. Before I could catch my breath, I was lifted and held by my neck on the wall. I was not surprised when I saw who it was.

"I thought he'd never leave," Lily said, she must be talking about Damon. "Now I've taken a new approach since civility didn't do it for you," she turned to look at Caroline on the floor, from the angle at which her head turned it seemed like her neck was, broken.

"You're sick Lily," I said, and she placed pressure on my neck in response, temporarily cutting off my air supply. After I had refocused, there was another person in the room. I shifted my eyes from Lily to the new person I didn't recognize.

"My friend Thomas here is going to take Caroline. If you come with me and do the spell, I'll make sure she's not harm but," she said bluntly, I saw her slave Thomas pulled a wooden stake from his back pocket then moved towards Caroline.

"Well let's just say she'll be dead, she was injected with vervain, so I don't think she will be waking up anytime soon." she laughed at my fear for Caroline's safety. She knew that I would do anything for the people I loved.

"And I almost forgot, if you use magic against me she is also dead. Now that, that settled let's go,"


	13. All Is Fair

**A/N: THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND. WARNING M RATED STUFF UP AHEAD!**

 _"Well let's just say she'll be dead, she was, injected with vervain, so I don't think she will be waking up anytime soon." she laughed at my fear for Caroline's safety. She knew that I would do anything for the people I love.  
_

 _"And I almost forgot, if you use magic against me she is also dead. Now that, that settled let's go,"_

 **CHAPTER THIRTEEN: All Is Fair**

"Ugh," I gasped, stumbling out the front door. I thrust my hand out in front of me to stop myself from falling head first into the asphalt driveway. My hands were bound together in front of me with a tape.

"Get a move on dear, we don't have all night," Lily said pushing me forward again.

"How am I even suppose to help you, I don't know anything about releasing vampires from the prison world," I said.

"Then how did you get yourself and Damon out?" Lily responded, and I blanked perplexed by her comeback.

"You can't lie to me Bonnie, I've learned everything about you," she continued a smirk playing on her lips. "Now get in the car!"

I sighed, defeated and slipped into the backseat of her car. It seemed brand new; she probably stole it; I briefly wondered if she knew how to drive. I got my answer when the compelled human whatever his name was got into the driver's side of the car while Lily sat in the other front seat.

"Where is Caroline?" I asked nervously. "You don't worry about her, just make sure you know that spell," Lily said briefly looking at me in the back seat before turning back up front as the car pulled out of the driveway. The car made a sharp turn, and I was thrown to the side and something poked into my hip. I looked down and silently rejoiced when Caroline's phone slipped out of my pocket and onto the car seat.

Slowly I brought my hand around to click on the screen, watching Lily up front out of the corner of my eyes. I pressed the speed dial button and Stefan name popped up; I clicked on his name immediately, and it started to ring. I crossed my fingers and prayed that he answered and he did. I turned back to the front and said.

"Where are you taking me, Lily?"

"You'll find out soon enough," she said, not even bothering to look back at me. " I want to know what you've done with Caroline?" I continued, hoping Stefan heard everything.

"Your friend is fine, do your part, and she stays that way," We kept driving until we arrived at some crypt, it looked like the Salvatore family crypt. I moved to pick up the phone trying to hold it on the call while pushing it my pocket. But it slipped and fell to the car floor with a thumped. I closed my eyes and gritted my teeth. Shit!.

"What was that?" she swiftly turned her head to me. " Stop the car now!" she said, her eyes still on me. She stepped out, opened the back door, grasped my elbow and pulled me out. I stumbled through the door and onto the ground. I felt my hands and knee burn as they scraped against the rough dirt.

"You little bitch!" Lily picked up the phone and crushed it in her hand. Then, I was suddenly flying in the other direction, backhanded by Lily. I cried out in pain when my back and _head_ connected to a tree. My vision blurred, and I started to slip in and out of consciousness. I saw someone walking toward me. Then I was being held by my neck and knocked into the tree again. I could hear talking, but I was so out of it, I could hardly make out the words.

I tried focusing on my powers shifting through anything that could help me. Lily squeezed my neck tighter, and I panicked as air was slowly leaving me. I grabbed her hand that was around my neck with all the energy I had left. Her hand then slipped from my neck, and I fell to the ground gasping for air, my ankle twisting unpleasantly. I fought through the pain and saw her shaking her hands as if they were on fire. The pain in my back was excruciating, was it broken? I couldn't move.

I heard a whooshed, then Stefan was above me, I sob in relief as he pulled me into his arms. Then I passed out.

I snapped up into a sitting position and realized that I was on a bed, in a room somewhere. I wasn't sure I didn't recognize my surroundings. I looked to the door as it opened and Stefan walked in. I must be at the boarding house. He held out his hand to me with a cup filled with tea. I took it from him with a quiet thanks and took a small sip. Caroline suddenly slipped in my mind. He seemed to sense my worry and reassured me that she was okay.

"How did you find me?" I asked, taking another sip of the tea, which was rather nice.

"I was already on my way over to see you, just to check up and make sure you were alright." he started, sitting at the foot of the bed. "I got your call as soon as I was pulling into your driveway. I figure you probably weren't very far. I remembered that my mother wanted to bring back her friends so the only placed she'd want to go, is the crypt," he finished with a sigh.

"Thank you, Stefan," I said sincerely. "Is this Damon room?" I asked, realizing why I didn't recognize it. He nodded.

"Um, where is he?" I asked quietly. I was sure Stefan knew about us by then.

"He's in the basement, locking up our mother," he said with a sad smile, I felt sympathy for him, his mother was a psycho. "So you and Damon huh, I must admit I was shocked,"

"Yeah, me too," I replied, staring down into my cup. "It was an accident really," I said thoughtfully.

"You, falling for my brother, you mean?"

"Yeah, he crept up on me,"

"Damon has a habit of doing that," Stefan chuckled a little, his expression thoughtful.

"I think I messed up Stefan, and I-..." I was cut off by a knock on the door and Damon's voice.

"Do you mind if we have a minute?" Damon directed his question to Stefan, and he promised we'd talk later before slipping out of the room. I cradled the tea cup in my hand tapping on the rim nervously.

"You okay?" he asked, stepping through the door and closing it behind him.

"Yeah….." I replied, not sure what to say exactly. I wasn't sure where we stood with each other.

"You were out cold; we had to inject you with some of my blood," he muttered moving over to the bed. He sat closer to me than where Stefan sat previously. He took the cup from my hand without warning and place it on the side table. Then took my hands in his and I sighed blissfully at his touch.

I missed it so much, without a thought, I climbed onto his lap and wrapped my hands around him burrowing my face into his neck. He pulled me close to him and wrapped his arms around my waist. His nose was rubbing against my neck. We sat there for what seemed like hours wrapped up each other arms.

"I should have never left," Damon said, squeezing me tighter into his chest.

"It's over now," I replied, pulling away from him a little to look at his face. His eyes snapped to me. They looked so unnatural up close, the most beautiful shade of blue, I'd ever seen. He pushed his face forward, brushing his lips against mine softly. It felt like decades since he had last kissed me. I sighed against his lips and pushed back more against him. His tongue slid against mine, and I happily opened my mouth and welcomed his tongue as it danced with mine.

He squeezed me more to him as the kiss deepened and picked up. He then twisted his body and placed me down onto the mattress. My legs were still wrapped around him when he hovered over me. His mouth still glued to my own. He twisted his head to the side to kiss me deeper, sucking my tongue into his mouth before his tongue dive back between my lips. I moaned and pulled him closer with my legs. My heart pounding in my chest as my skin heated up and liquid pooled at my center.

His hands started to move over me. Gripping my waist, then running up my side and kneading my breast through my blouse. I gasped at how good his touch felt, and I wanted more, much more.

"Damon," I moaned grinding myself against his hard arousal. His hands then moved down to my jeans button; then he was tugging them down my legs. He then moved back up on top of me, his hands going to my breast again, but I needed his touch somewhere else entirely. I grabbed his hand on my chest and pushed it down to my panties.

He sensed what I wanted, and his large hand disappears into the flimsy clothing. When his fingers made contact with my folds, we both moan. His mouth immediately sealed over mine, while his fingers continued to probe me. I moaned at his touch, wrapping my arms tightly around his neck.

His fingers then came in contact with my clit, and I cried out at the pleasure that shot through my body. I could feel myself getting wetter. A whimper slipped passed my lips as his hand slipped down through my folds before parting them. A finger toyed with my opening before plunging in. I cried out in pleasure and gripped his shoulders tighter.

"Fuck!" I heard him curse in a whispered voice; he slipped his finger in and out of me before adding another stretching me deliciously. I moaned sweetly and grind against his fingers chasing that high.

He added another finger to my core while his thumb started rubbing circles on my clit and I was gone just like that my orgasm was right there. I cried out as white spots flash before my eyes as I cum, hard. My body shudders in aftershock before I sagged into the mattress and gasped air into my lungs. Shit!

* * *

All I could think about as I sat listening to Caroline talking at the table in the Salvatore kitchen was Damon and what he did with his fingers just an hour before. Caroline came knocking on the door as soon as Damon gave me that mind blowing orgasm. I reluctantly left him to make sure my friend was alright.

"Bonnie, are you listening to me?" She asked, I instantly felt guilty and returned my attention to her. "What was it, you were saying Caroline?" I asked smiling apologetically at her.

"I said Elena was on her way over," I heard the words leave Caroline mouth, and my mood did an _180_ downward. "Oh," I murmured, Caroline turned and raised an eyebrow at me. She turned and walked into the living, and I followed behind her and plopped into the couch in the middle of the room.

"So you know she took the cure then?" She asked.

"Yeah, she called before Lily kidnapped us," I said, stuffing my feet under me on the couch.

"I'm so happy we did something about Lily, she's a psycho bitch that needed to go down before someone got seriously hurt,"

"I totally agree with you Caroline, Stefan and Damon are the ones that need to figure out what they're gonna do with her,"

"What is there to figure out, I get that she's their mother, but she doesn't even care about them. This is the second time she almost killed you. We shouldn't have waited this long to take her seriously," I was about to respond to Caroline when the front door opened and Elena stepped through.

"Hey guys," Elena said, slowly making her way into the living room of the Salvatore house. Caroline rose from the couch to greet her.

"Hey Elena so, you're human again, huh?" Caroline asked giving Elena a quick hug before sitting back on the couch.

"Yeah, it feels great, like myself again and more comfortable in my body," Elena looked over to where I sat and I tried to say something, anything, but I just couldn't get the words out.

"I heard you guys got kidnapped by Lily Salvatore are you okay?" She asked after a while, I at that time found my voice and responded to her.

"Yeah, we're okay, thanks to Stefan," I said.

"Oh, that's great," Elena said, nodding her head and looking down at her feet. " So are they here?" I looked up at her, studying her posture. I knew she was _really,_ asking if Damon was here. I chose not to say anything or else I would have given away how upset I was with the situation.

Caroline decided to answer when she realized I wasn't going to. "Um, I think Stefan's out, but Damon's upstairs. I watch as Elena expression brightens at the mention of Damon's name. I couldn't help but felt threatened. Damon and I were just getting back in a good place. I didn't even know _exactly_ what was going on in his head. Elena couldn't have chosen to regain her memories at a worse time.

Speaking of, Damon came strutting down the stairs, and we all looked up as he made his way into the living room. His eyes immediately looked over at me as his lips rose in a smirk most likely remembering what we did earlier. His eyes then flashed over to Elena and I held my breathe as he stared at her in confusion _then_ understanding.

"You took the cure?" He asked Elena lightly. Elena seemed delighted when he addressed her and stepped closer to where he stood.

"Yeah, I wasn't really cut out to be a vampire anyway," Elena shrugged her shoulder and continued. " And I was tired of the blank spots in my memories,"

"So your whole memory is back?" he asked, and my heart beats faster in aggravation at the conversation taking place in front of me. I saw Elena smiled brightly at Damon and I twisted my hand in my lap nervously. _Why was I feeling like this?_ I had no idea. Elena smiled sweetly at Damon and said.

"Yeah, I remember everything."


	14. The Painful Truth

**A/N THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.  
**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.**

" _So your whole memory is back?" he asked, and my heart beats faster in aggravation at the conversation taking place in front of me. I saw Elena smiled brightly at Damon and I twisted my hand in my lap nervously. Why was I feeling like this? I had no idea. Elena smiled sweetly at Damon and said._

" _Yeah, I remember everything."_

 **CHAPTER FOURTEEN: The Painful Truth**

Could I be any more pathetic? I was up in the middle of the night pacing anxiously in my bedroom. Elena said she wanted to have a talk with Damon in private. Damon looked over to me as if silently asking if I was alright with that.

And me being me, pretended like it was no big deal and even got up and left the boarding house and drove home. Now I was going out of mind thinking that somehow Damon has fallen back in love with Elena and they were currently having crazy makeup sex or something. I couldn't get the images out of my head, STOP, focus. This was exactly what Damon was talking about, me having little faith in him.

I just need to have a little faith, yes, there, I was calming down. Even though it had been hours now and nothing. I slump down onto the bed and slid my hand over my face. Why was I doing this to myself? Oh Right, I _loved_ the bloodsucker. I groaned and fell back onto the bed. My phone rang and I sprang to my feet desperately looking for it, I rolled my eyes at myself and my desperation. I finally found the phone then took a deep breath to calm myself and answered with a soft.

"Hello?"

 _"Hey, it's me," Damon's voice said over the phone._

"Hey," I replied. We remained silent for a while before he said.

 _You're not mad at me or something, are you?"_ My eyebrow furrowed in confusion at his question.

"Why would I be mad at you?"

 _"Well, you left the house in such a hurry and you didn't say anything…"  
_

"Oh….no I'm sorry, I'm not mad at you, I never was,"

" _Great, can you come open the door for me?"_

"Oh," I responded surprised, I quickly descended the stairs and went to the front door. He was standing on my porch with the cell phone still at his ear, a small smile on his lips.

"Hi," He said, stepping in through the door and I involuntarily stepped back.

"Hi," the little word came out as a whisper from my lips, I didn't want the thought to cross my mind but it did, he was here with _me_ and not _her_ and I felt a little victorious about that.

"Were you waiting up for me?" he asked the smile widening on his face as a blush crept up on mine.

"Cocky much?" I asked folding my hands over my chest and raising an eyebrow at him, he chuckles and before long he pulled me into his arms and placed a lingering kiss on my lips.

"I was hoping we could pick up where we left off in my bedroom," he whispered against my lips, causing a delicious shiver to run down my spine. Oh I really wanted us to but that would have to wait first, we were in serious need of a talk about us, Elena and everything that happened. He was trying to distract me which means talking was something he did not want to do.

"Damon can we just talk a little first please," I whispered pulling back from his lips. I looked up at him, apprehension was written all over his face. That alone got me worried. I felt him looped his fingers through mine and pulled me over to the couch. We both flopped down into the middle and the side cushions and turned facing each other.

"Tell me what happened?" I asked apprehensively, I watch his face as his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes narrowed at me.

"I know what's going on in your head Bonnie….." He trailed off and I felt a little guilty that I had started to doubt him again.

"Nothing happened, okay," he reassured me squeezing my hand in his. But I couldn't help myself I had to ask.

"What did Elena wanted to talk about?" He quirked an eyebrow at me before releasing a defeated sigh.

"She told me that she was glad she took the cure because she was seeing things clearly now," I listened to his words, processing what he was saying.

"Sh….she said she loves me a..and the feelings were coming at her so strong she had to come see me," I stared at his jeans clothed thighs as I digested his words, how he stumbled over trying to tell me what went down when I left. I took in a steady breath and tried to control my emotions.

"Anything else?" I asked a little peeved.

"She said she doesn't see herself getting over her feelings for me and she asked how serious my and your relationship was?" he finished, I could hear the nerves in his voice which was so unlike Damon. I took in another breath which was visibly shakier this time and asked the question to the answer that would either make or break my heart.

"Do you want to be with her?" His response was short and immediate.

"No,"

"Why?"

"What are you asking me this?" the irritation in his voice startled me.

"I just….I need to know before we can move forward in our relationship, I know how you get when it comes to Elena, just like Katherine I…." I was sharply cut off as he ripped his hands out of mine and stood.

"So is that what defines me now, my past most destructive relationships?" He looked down at me in anger and all I did was gapped as he continued.

"What I had with Katherine was never real she used me, compelled me and made me believe for 150 years that there was hope for us!"

"I had this fantasy of how I always wanted Katherine to be in my head and Elena just suddenly had everything, the exact replica of how I wanted my relationship with Katherine to be like, along with one-upping my brother of course. But it turned out to be just as fake because there was still a fucking bond involved when I sired her, that's when I realized that none, none of it….." He trailed off suddenly before turning to me and stared, his face contorting in an expression of bewilderment then acceptance. I waited for him to continue not wanting to ruin things when he was letting me see so much of this side of him that interested me.

I blinked and all of a sudden and he was gone, I gasped as I heard the opening of the front door as it slammed into the wall and remained wide open. I didn't know what to think! What had just happen? Why did he run away from me? I sat on the couch still shock in disbelief. It took me almost ten minutes to move from my position on the couch and closed the door before leaning on the back.

My breathing was harsh and my thoughts were jumbled, I was so confused and hurt. He left, but why? I had to find out, but I didn't know where he went perhaps it was back to the boarding house? I grabbed my jacket and pulled it over my shoulder, then grabbed my car keys. I knew it was late most likely way past midnight, but I wouldn't be able to go to sleep without knowing.

* * *

I pulled up at the boarding house with a heavy heart, walking up to the front door. I didn't know what to expect he probably wasn't even there. But Stefan might, I could still talk to Stefan. I knock on the door and waited, no answer I was about to knock again when the door pulled open and Elena stood in front of me. I was a little taken aback, I thought she would have gone back to Whitmore already.

"Um… Bonnie, what are you doing here?" she asked and looked even more confused that I was standing there.

"I could ask you the same thing?" I said moving past her and into the house.

I spotted a blanket and pillow on the couch and frown.

"Oh I was waiting up for Damon," the fact that she said it as if it was the most obvious thing in the world angered me.

"I can see that, you do know that we're together right?" I gritted out barely able to contain my anger at her. Elena's eyes narrowed at me before she folded her arms and spat.

"Since when?" she raised an eyebrow at me and grimaced.

"Please, Elena you know since when." My answer felt rather childish and I rolled my eyes at myself.

"But how could you Bonnie? You know he's in love with me, I thought you were my best friend," she spat and had the audacity to look disappointed and disgusted with me.

"You erased your memories of him!" I reminded her venomously. "Then you told me yourself that you didn't want a relationship with him, remember a couple weeks ago, in your dorm room?"

"Oh for god sakes my memories were gone! I didn't even remember falling in love with him!" she shouted.

"And whose fault was that! You didn't believe in him enough to know he would fight his way back to you!" I shouted back.

"You know what Bonnie you are pathetic, you were so fearful that Damon didn't care for you that you hid the cure from him and lied about it, so you are no one to talk about faith!" that sting really bad because it was so true.

"You need to face the facts Bonnie, the only reason Damon ever wasted his time with you, was because I wasn't available, do you really think he would continue with you when I now have my memories back," Her words were hitting me hard, I had those thoughts before too and I had hoped they weren't true that I wasn't just a space holder, until what Damon truly wanted was returned him, was I?


	15. A Statement Made

**A/N THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS. I KNOW I'VE BEEN AWAY FOR A WHILE AND YOU GUYS HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR AN UPDATE FOR LIKE FOREVER. SO I WANT TO THANK YOU GUYS FOR STICKING WITH ME FOR SO LONG.  
**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND**.

 _"You know what Bonnie you are pathetic, you were so fearful that Damon didn't care for you that you hid the cure from him and lied about it, so you are no one to talk about faith!" that sting really bad because it was so true._

 _"You need to face the facts bonnie, the only reason Damon ever wasted his time you was because I wasn't available, do you really think he would continue with you when I now have my memories back? please!" Her words were hitting me hard, I had those thoughts before too and I had hoped they weren't true that I wasn't just a space holder until what Damon truly wanted was returned him, was I?  
_

 **WARNING: M-Rating in Effect, Very graphic scenes down below!**

 **CHAPTER FIFTEEN: A Statement Made**

Elena continued to ramble on about how wrong Damon's and I relationship was, and that how a hypocritical person I was. And I just stood there and took it all in, I honestly didn't know what to say. I was about to just damn it all to hell and leave when I heard a voice by the door.

"That's enough Elena!" Damon said from the doorway, I didn't even notice when he had arrived. Was he listening to us the whole time? He looked _livid_ as his eyes shifted from Elena to me. My eyes fell to the floor to avoid his intense gaze when it landed on me.

"Elena you need to leave now!" Damon said, his voice held no room for excuses. My head snapped up, looking from Damon's angry face to Elena's desperate one. I was a little shocked.

"But...But Damon, I love you," Elena said desperately turning from me and moving over to Damon. She brought her hands up to his face and he flinched away from her. I watched the scene with elation.

"You and I were never real Elena, you need to accept that, has I have," He moved away from her entirely and walked over to me, my heart swells with every step he took closer to my person.

"But, I don't I…..I don't understand, wha….what do you mean. Damon, you were madly in love with me," Elena's face was squished up with anger and disbelief.

"I was infatuated with you and obsessed with besting my brother, but I'm over all that now. I'm tired of settling for second best."

"What? Are you kidding me! So that's it? Just like that, you're over _me?_ For _Bonnie?_ " Elena scoffs her disapproval and utter disbelief. She shot me the most hatred stare I have ever seen on her face before slipping through and slamming the door hard behind her. I watched her departure in astonishment. What had just happened?

I just lost one of my best friends and I know I should feel bad but, didn't she had it coming? I could feel Damon's gaze trying to penetrate my skull from where he stood beside me. All of sudden I was a little nervous and shy.

Everything that Elena had said a couple minutes ago were still twirling through my head. It was all still fresh. I turned and looked up at him while chewing at my bottom lip nervously. He just told off Elena and choose me. I didn't know how to approach that.

"So does that answer your question from before?" he asked capturing my full attention, his bright blue eyes dancing over my face. I nodded still a little stunned.

"But why did you leave me earlier?" I asked softly as he moved a hand over my left cheek.

"I had an epiphany, it shook me up a bit," he said while sliding a finger over my lips and a hand around my waist to pull me closer.

"Which was?" I whispered breathlessly at the feelings he were stirring within me when he lips ghosted over mine.

"That I'm so completely in love with you," he said rest his forehead against my own before his lips sealed over mine, sliding his tongue into my mouth and taking my breath away. My heart was beating so fast my grip on his forearms tighten. I couldn't believe this was happening. He pulled back to look me in the eyes, I stared at the desire swirling in his for me and I was sure he could see mine too. Before I could utter those three little words back, the words that I had wanted to say him for quite some time.

His lips found mine again hungrily taking them into a bruising kiss, I gasped at the speed at which I was pinned to the nearby wall as his tongue slipped between my parted lips. His tongue circled around mine before sucking it into his mouth. I moaned and fisted the material of his shirt in my hand while rubbing up against him. I was getting wet so fast!

His hands grabbed at each side of my face, holding my head still while he twisted his to the side to kiss me deeper, harder, sweeter exploring every crevice of my mouth. My heart thundered in my chest continuously and my brain had slipped into a different realm.

His right hand slipped from my neck down to my chest to grope my cloth breast thoroughly. I moaned at the contact and pushed my chest more into his hand. He suddenly stepped back from me and I missed his body against mine immediately. He started gripping at my clothes impatiently.

"Clothes off now," he said huskily, not wasting any time, I pushed my blouse up and over my head. I reached for his shirt too, aching to feel his bare skin against mine. Soon after our pants disappear too leaving us in only our undergarments.

I felt Damon lift me up into his arms and I instantly wrap my legs around his waist as he moves about. Shortly afterward my body was being placed onto the soft bed in his room. His body covered mine as he found my lips again while his hands roam my body. His hand reached under my back to unclasp my bra, it slipped from my body exposing my breast to his eyes.

His lips quickly moved down from my lips to lash onto one of my nipples while he kneaded the other breast in his hand. My skin tingled at his cool touch and my nipples ached at his ministrations.

His lips continued to work each of my breasts while his hand drifted lower. Ghosting over my abdomen and disappearing into my panties. I felt him shifted his body over mine placing a leg between my legs and nudging them apart.

I gasped at the sensation of his fingers running over my lower lips arousing me even more. His fingers teasingly stroking my clit, it was driving me mad. I pushed my hips up starving for more of his touch.

"Patience my little witch," he whispered seductively against my hardened nipple before pulling at it with his teeth. Pleasure shot right from there to my center damping me even more. I wiggled my hips more against his fingers.

"Damon, please," I begged, dying to douse the fire at my core. This feeling was so foreign, I never knew I could want someone so much.

"Please, what?" he asked moving back up to my lips. His blue eyes darted over my face from my heavily lid eyes to the way I harshly chewed at my bottom lip. "Touch me," I gasped at him desperately, I wanted him so bad and it had been so long. His fingers slipped between my folds then I heard him cursed when he discovered how wet I really was.

"Fuck, Bonnie, your so wet" he muttered against my lips stifling my whimpers when he dipped a finger deep inside me.

"Damon," I gasped as he pulled his finger out then spread my arousal over my clit causing my hip to jerk up at him. His fingers moved down to my center again. This time dipping two fingers inside stretching me, and forcing a moan from my lips.

He pulled out his digits then push them back in again deeper my walls stretched then clamped around his fingers. He started moving them faster in, out, in, out and soon I was close.

I rode and climbed until I fell, a sweet cry leaving my lips when my orgasm hits. I was still high when I felt him pulled at my panties relieving me of my last piece of clothing.

"I need to be inside you," he said huskily pushing my legs apart and slipping between them. "Yes," I breath while nodding my head in absolute agreement. I reached for his boxers pushing them down as much as I could until he did the rest and kicked them off his feet.

I reached blindly for his cock and grabbed a hold of it. My eyes widen, _Holy Shit_ , he was thick and smooth and _lengthy_ and fucking _big_. I bit my lip and moaned just thinking about him inside me, stretching me. Fuck!

Jeremy was nowhere near this endowed, I wasn't a virgin. Jeremy was the only one I had ever been with, but it was only once and it was less than satisfactory. Damon's hand came over mine on his cock and I gripped him a little tighter causing a groan to slip from his throat.

"Bonnie I'm in agony here," he murmured as his head fell on my right shoulder. He suddenly grips my hands and pins them above my head. The head of his cock then moved over my opening causing me to tense at the pleasure that shoots through me at just that one contact. I opened my legs wider and dip my hips towards him urging him to get inside, and boy did I get my wish.

Slowly at first, he slipped inside, my mouth popped open and my eyes rolled back as he slipped in deeper and deeper. His cock stretched my walls to submission with a mixture of both pleasure and pain. He continued pushing in until I could take no more. And a strangled cry and gasp squeezed through my throat.

"Bonnie you okay?" he groaned breathlessly, he immediately released my pinned hands and I gripped his shoulders for support. I nodded my head unable to form words. His right hand grip my thigh and spread my leg wider and higher over his waist before he pulled out and immediately dip back inside.

"Fuck! _Oh god!_ Damon!" I cried as the sweet mixture of pleasure and pain washed over my body again. I heard him groan and mumble something I didn't understand. He did it again dipping in then pulling out, again and again, earning a cry from me every time.

He started going faster and deeper, harder then slower working my core to his pleasure and causing a frenzy within my body. One of my hand moves to grip the sheet while the other gripped the back of his neck for dare life. He continued his thrust never stopping and soon I could feel it again, the tightening of my belly, the cold mixed with the hot feeling of my skin, then the crash of my orgasm through my body.

"Ahhh Ahh…-Damon," my voice escalated without my consent as I rode through my second orgasm. My body sagged on the bed after but Damon was nowhere near done with me. As soon as I came back to earth, Damon was pushing both my legs into my chest.

My knees pushed under my chin. I had little time to recover before he sank deep into my pussy again. A new sensation rushing over me at the new position. I cried out at the pleasure radiating from my center, _Fuck! he was huge_ , my breath struggling at my throat. I gripped my legs closer to my chest and held on as he fucked me. Hard!

"You feel so good, so fucking tight Goddamn it," I heard Damon groan above me, he moved faster than before. His speed and thrust never wavered and I wondered for a moment if he wasn't getting fatigue until the occasional shifting of his vampire face quickly answered my question. _Right not human_. My head space was numb at the moment, coherent thoughts were impossible to make.

Again my stomach tense and my inner walls clamped around his cock pulling him in deeper. I heard him moan my name then felt him spilling inside of me. That was enough to throw me over the edge again and I came right behind him.

Cries after cries of his name fell from my lips, afterward, I couldn't move, aftershocks of my orgasm jolted through my body and that was all the movement I could do. I was too tired and exhausted to even utter a word. All I felt before slipping into unconscious was Damon pulling me in his arms and telling me he loves me. I willing entered the dark with a smile.

 **Wow, that was steamy ;) Watch out for the next chap, coming soon!**


	16. Again?

**A/N THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS THEY MEAN ALOT.  
**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.**

 _Again my stomach tense and my inner walls clamped around his cock. I heard him moan my name then felt him spilling inside of me. That was enough to throw me over the edge again and I came right behind him._

 _Cries after cries of his name fell from my lips, afterward, I couldn't move aftershocks of my orgasm jolted through my body but that was all the movement I could do. All I felt before slipping into unconscious was Damon pulling me in his arms and telling me he loves me again. I willing entered the dark with a smile._

 **WARNING: Very Heavy Sexual Content up ahead! (M-rating)**

 **CHAPTER SIXTEEN: Again?**

I was slowly becoming aware of the pitter patter on the window to my right. Rain! I opened my eyes to discover that the window was covered in water from the steady drizzle. I also started to became aware of the heavy body that was tangled up with mine. Groaning softly I turned my head around only to become face to face with a sleeping Damon. His soft breath blowing out into my face.

A huge smile crept across my lips as last night's events flooded through my mind. I subconsciously rubbed my naked thighs together and felt a dull ache, _yep_ thoroughly taken, and so happy about it. I laid there with Damon for a while basking in the content feeling before nature demanded I seek out the bathroom.

Cautiously, I detangled myself from Damon limbs and rush to the bathroom to take care of my needs. After reentering the bedroom I looked around for my clothes but couldn't find them. Giving up, I rambled through Damon's drawer finding one of his big black T-shirts and throwing it over my head and down my body, it dropped mid-thigh.

Damon was still asleep so peaceful _wow_ , I never thought I would be calling Damon peaceful. I exited his bedroom and headed downstairs. On my way to the kitchen, I saw our clothes scattered across the floor in the living room. I quickly grabbed them up and place then in a bundle on the couch as my stomach growled. I continued on my track to the kitchen in search of anything to eat or drink. I suddenly pause at Stefan sitting around the island in the Kitchen, a little embarrassed. I wanted to just turn and ran.

"I already saw you, Bonnie!" Stefan said as I tried unsuccessfully to tip-toe back around the corner. Slowly I stepped into the kitchen to face Stefan who had an amused eyebrow raised.

"Rough night?" he asked with a light laugh, I rolled my eyes at him and was very tempted to walk away again but the steaming cup of coffee in his hand caught my eye.

"Is there more of that?" I asked instead moving around Stefan and spotting the half filled coffee pot, freshly brewed. I poured myself a cup then turned my back to the counter sipping contently. Stefan then spun around in his chair to look at me.

"So…." He smirked at me again.

"No.. Stefan I am not having this conversation with you!"

"What conversation?" Damon said entering the kitchen in only a pajama bottom, who knew Damon wear those. He moved over to where I was leaning on the counter and took my cup of coffee right out of my hand.

"Hey, I was drinking that," I basically whined, both brothers chuckled at my reaction, then Damon repeated his question from when he first entered.

"Your brother here wants all the glory details of our night," I said with a smirk in Stefan direction. His smile dropped from his face immediately and he frowned into his teacup, it was so amusing to watch.

"Well," he said quickly depositing his remaining coffee into the sink. "That is my cue to be out of here, I'll see you guys later."

"Where are you going?" I asked last minute even though he had already exited the kitchen. He paused and I thought he wasn't going to answer but to my surprised he did.

"Um….to ...see Caroline?" He said and I chuckled at the way he sounded unsure.

"So you banging blondie now?" Damon asked and I almost choked.

"Damon!" I scrolled, he turned to me with a raised eyebrow. "Don't be so crass about it," I said softly

"Crass? Me? You should talk, you were passed crass, late night," he said and my eyes popped out. Oh my god, I can't believe he just said that, in front of Stefan.

"O…..Kay, I am, so gone," Stefan said, turning his back to us before either Damon or I could say another word we heard the front door opened and closed softly behind him. I stuck my tongue out at Damon and had planned to move past him to get some real clothes on since the only piece of clothing I had on was Damon's T-shirt. Damon had other plans, though. He suddenly grabbed me from behind, I struggled against him a little before relenting into his embrace.

"Where do you think you're going?" He whispered huskily in my ear before sucking on my neck sending chills through my body, my thighs unconsciously clutch together as he continues sucking on my neck. Fuck! I was wet! Already? What has this vampire turned me into?

"I was dying for him to get the _fuck out_ of here, so I could _fuck you_ ," He growled in my ear, my eyes widen and I squirmed against him as his words tingled my core and wetness continued to gush between my thighs. God, I wanted him, A mantra quickly ran through my head. Yes! Yes! Yes! Fuck me, please. I didn't know if I said that out loud or not I wasn't entirely in my right mind at the moment, but.

Before I could blink my chest was pressed down onto the kitchen table and my legs were pushed apart. My heart sped up and was beating rapidly against my chest. My breathing was nervously escaping my lips as I waited for what's about to happen. I heard Damon relieving himself of his pants then the cloth dropping to the floor. Seconds later, I felt the head of his cock rubbed against my entrance teasing me.

"Wet already for me Bon?" I felt as he, dipped in and out of my opening and coated himself in my arousal. I bit my lip and moaned twirling my hips at him impatiently. His hands steadied my hips then began running up and down my back and my ass kneading into my flesh and pushing my shirt up and over my head.

His touch tingled my skin, I twisted my head trying to tell him to fuck me already! But before I could he slammed hard into me giving me exactly what I wanted. A sharp cry slipped from my lips and I gripped the edges of the table as my body tried to get accustomed to being taken so suddenly.

"Ahhh. Fuck! Fuck!" I cried as he forced more of his length inside my pussy. Stretching me and reaching nerves I didn't even know exist within me. The sheer size of Damon taking me so abruptly in this new position had him feeling really _huge_ and _deep_ within my core. I felt him lean over my trembling body to whisper in my ear.

"Talk about _crass!_ " he hissed, kissing down my back, I felt him pulled from me then he was back again. I moaned hoarsely, my forehead falling heavily and helplessly into the hardwood table as he slipped so deep, he felt so, _SO good_. He went slowly for a few seconds getting me reacquainted with him before he was gripping my hips and driving hard into my tight hole.

I hanged onto the table for dare life and took everything. I've never been taken like this and I couldn't concentrate, all that was running through my mind was Damon and his cock that was fucking me. In, out, in, out, Damon, Damon, Damon.

I didn't know I could feel like this, the overwhelmingly intense pleasure that was coursing through my body scared me. Damon had broken me, to the core, he had me, there was nothing I could do.

"Ahhh oh god Damon! yes, yes, yessss" I felt the building of an orgasm within my gut so soon, It continued to rise as he continues his assault on my center, taking what he wanted for as long as he wanted. Then I was falling, hard! I cried desperately into the table as my body jerked, shuttered and spilled around him.

Fuck, that was so...oo good, I was suddenly pulled swiftly from the table and into Damon's chest his breath harsh at my ear as he reigns kisses down my neck

"I l...love you s...so much." he groaned into my neck has hips continued to thrust against me. I wanted to tell him I love him too but I couldn't find my voice. So I settle for moaning and gripping his arms that held me in place tightly around my waist and the other squeezing one of my breasts.

My skin was glistening with sweat. I don't know how long we've been fucking but I came two more times before I felt Damon turned my head to the side, bit harshly into my neck and came with a groan which was muffed my neck. He continued sucking greedily from me. My eyes widen and the grip I had on his hand tightened as something very very intense washed over me.

It was such a painful and pleasurable surprise that an unsuspectingly sharp orgasm rippled through my body, for a moment I thought I passed out. It was more intense than any orgasm I've ever had. Afterward, if Damon wasn't holding me up I would have melted into a puddle at his feet on the floor.

"Woah there, your stamina is sorely lacking there witchy." he said slipping his hand under my weak legs and cradling me in his arms.

With my eyes barely able to keep themselves open, I looked up at him astonished. "What? Damon, you're a _vampire_ ," I emphasized holding on tighter to his neck, my whole body felt weak and overworked. He really did a number on me, Soon, Damon had placed me softly on the bed. Hovering over me.

"You shouldn't have left this bed. I woke up to get another dose of you only to find you gone, here," He said biting his wrist and bringing it to my lips, he grins at me as I took large gulps from him. Relieving the soreness in my body.

"That's a good witch, feeling better?" he asked as he moved his lips closer to slip over mine, I nodded my head tiredly and parted my lips and his tongue thrust inside coaxing mine into his mouth. He kissed me so leisurely, deep and sweetly that it had my toes curling into the mattress.

"I want you," he whispered softly against my lips and my eyes went wide for another time. Again? I thought, then he spoke once more, widening my eyes even further.

"I need to see if you taste as good as you smell," He grinned brightly at my 'O' expression before depositing his face between my parted thighs. What have I gotten myself into?

 **Wow wee! another steamy one! The next chapter will be coming soon!**


	17. Nightmare

**A/N THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.  
**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.**

" _I want you," he said and my eyes went wide. Again? Then he spoke once more, widening my eyes even further._

" _I need to see if you taste as good as you smell," He grinned brightly at my 'O' expression before diving between my thigh. What have I gotten myself into?_

 **CHAPTER SEVENTEEN: Nightmare**

 _It was dark and cold. My hands felt wet and sticky like, where was I? I thought, suddenly a bright light flashed across my face, and I was temporarily blinded then it was dark again. I heard someone let out a menacing laugh to my right and my heart thundered in my chest in fear. My head turned sharply to the left and I jump as a piercing shriek sailed through the air from that corner. I still couldn't see anything, where the fuck was I?  
_

 _I held my hand out and started feeling around me for anything. But the cold, hard, and sticky wet floor, was all that surrounded me. My hand suddenly came in contact with a wall and I felt around the wall for something, anything, a door may be, but there was nothing. I was stuck in a dark, sticky, cold concrete room. I started to panic, twisting around in the darkness with fear. How did I get in here? Who put me in here? My feet suddenly hit something and I fell hard against the concrete floor. The hit jolting the bones in my body with pain.  
_

 _I cradled my arms to my chest and groaned, then started to feel for whatever had tripped me and felt a leg, Oh my god! I felt up to the person's shoulders. Who was this? I couldn't see their faces. I began to shake whoever it was shoulders.  
_

 _"Please wake up, please!" I cried desperately, I had given up, moments before the person jumps up and grab my shoulders, a loud scream escaped my lips when the lights turn on all of a sudden and Kai's face appeared in front of me.  
_

 _"Missed me?" He asked his lips contorted into a sickening grin, and blooded veins clouding his eyes. His mouth was covered in blood dripping onto the floor. Fear gripped my heart strings and I was frozen. His grip on my shoulders tighten painfully and he drew me closer his mouth moving to my neck. I snapped out of my fear and start struggling to get away.  
_

 _"You won't escape me this time Bonnie," He growled then I felt his teeth tear into my neck, and I scream when I felt the life literally being sucked out of me.  
_

 _"Bonnie!" I heard someone shouted at me as if they were far away._

"BONNIE!" that one was louder and closer.

"Bonnie, wake up!" I suddenly snap up and let out a scream as a scrambled away from whoever was gripping me.

"Bonnie, baby it's me, it's Damon," I stop struggling and my eyes focused. Damon's face appeared in front of me and I calmed instantly then threw my arms around his neck and started to cry.

"Oh it was so awful Damon," I cried into his shoulder, his hands came up and wrap around my bareback, I just realize then that we were both naked and through the window outside it was still dark. Damon and I had spent the day together. It almost felt like we were back in the 1994 prison world again, just the two of us. We watched old movies with popcorn, cook up a storm and relax around the house. The only difference was that along with all of that we were now having sex. A lot of sex. Damon was utterly _insatiable_.

Thoughts of our day flooded my brain and it was just enough for me to forget that horrible nightmare, it was so bizarre, why was I even dreaming about Kai? And him biting me? What was that about? I wanted to forget about it, all of it. I moved my hand from Damon's shoulders and down to wrap it around his cock that was poking at my lower stomach. His whole body stiffen at my touch.

"Bonnie? His voice sounded both aroused and confused if that was possible. "What are you doing?" I didn't even answer him, I used my other hand and brought his head down to mine. I slid my lips over his own and his stiff posture slowly relaxed as his cock harden further into my hand. I pumped him slowly and slip my tongue into his mouth. His arms tighten around me and he pulled me closer, his bare chest flush against my own. I moaned at the feeling and pumped hard.

"Fuck!" I heard him groan into my against my lips, his hand then wrapped itself around my hand on his cock to stop my movement. "Wait, Bonnie, we need to talk first," he said and I pulled back from him and shook my head furiously.

"Please, Damon I….I need you," I said gripping his cock tighter. "Please," I practically begged again. I pleaded with him to just take that nightmare away, as I opened my mouth to beg again his tongue thrust inside and I was pushed back onto the bed. He wasn't gentle and it was exactly what I needed.

* * *

I could feel his stare trying to penetrate me. I knew he was dying to ask what happened to me last night but something was stopping him. I knew he wanted an explanation for last night. But how can I? When _I_ didn't even understand it _myself_ , was it trying to tell me something? I don't know. Maybe it was just a random thing, but what could have brought it on? Yesterday was the most perfect day of my life. What could have caused me to dream something like that?

Damon moved over to where I was packing some books into my bag. I had class in an hour and I needed to get going.

"Bonnie?" He spoke and I stop moving for a minute before resuming my task of look over which textbook I would be needing for my class.

"You can't ignore this, I thought we were gonna communicate more with each other," His breath fanned over my neck and I felt goosebumps prickled my skin. I slowly turned to look back at him, he raised an eyebrow expectantly.

"It was just a random dream, nothing to worry about," I said struggling my shoulders.

"Right," he said disbelievingly. "I know from experience that when it comes to witches _nothing_ is random or coincidental, you of all person should know that!" he finished and I felt as if he was scolding me and I didn't like it one bit. I bit my lip to keep myself from responding with something colorful.

"You know what Damon, I'm gonna go to class," I said picking up my bag and grabbing my car keys off the counter. "I'll see you later," I mumbled moving passed him; I was surprised when he remained silent as I stepped around him and exit through the door.

* * *

I had no idea why I insisted on going to class. I hardly paid any attention to the Lecturer as he blabbered on about god knows what. The dream I had the night before plagued me all day, as well as not hearing a word from Damon. He hasn't called or texted me since I left him at the house.

I couldn't fathom why I didn't tell him about the dream. It was so stupid of me. Why did I even have that dream? I mean, Kai deserved what he got didn't he? NO! Don't you dare! I will not feel guilty about what I did, he deserved every ounce of it for what he did to me. Guilt couldn't be the reason why I had that dream it had to be something else. My phone started to buzz in my pocket, my heart hammered in my chest as I hesitantly reach for it. Caroline's name flashed across the screen and I was a little disappointed that it wasn't Damon.

"Hey Care Whats up?"

"Hey, Bonnie I just wanted to tell you that I'm bringing over your invitation for the wedding this afternoon," Wedding? I stopped on my walk to the parking lot, a little confused.

"Who's Wedding?" I asked trying to recall who was getting married.

"Joe's and Alaric's,"

"Oh I didn't know,"

"Really I thought Stefan told you, he said he saw you yesterday morning at the house," She said and embarrassment colored my features as I recalled all of what happened yesterday.

"Oh he must have forgotten to mention it,"

"A vampire with memory lapsed?" she asked.

"Who knows," I replied.

"Anyway I'll bring your invitation over, I'll see you later," After the end of the phone call I resumed walking to my car but flattered when I saw Enzo leaning against it. I cautiously walked up to my car, he looked at up at me as I approached and straighten his stance.

"Enzo, what are you doing here?" I asked.

"I want you to do something for me," he said as if we were friends or something.

" _Excuse me?_ " He rolled his eyes at me before reaching into his back pocket, took out an iPod and stretched his hand out to me.

"What am I suppose to do with that?"

"Give it to Lily for me, tell her, her favorite songs are on there," he said and my eyebrows shot up into my hair line. Am I missing something?

"Why exactly would I do that?" I asked utterly confused since when did Enzo care about anybody but himself.

"Just give it to her, and stop with your questions will you?" I stared at him like a mad person before realization hit me out of nowhere.

" _Oh. My. God_ , yo…..your not in _love_ with her are you?" I asked a little disgusted. His face twisted unpleasantly and his lips went down in a frown.

"Will you give it to her or not?" he asked seriously, I was dumbfounded, I couldn't believe what was happening right now.

"I….I'm sorry Enzo but I can't help you with that," I stepped around him to get to my car, but stop when his hand grabbed my upper arm.

"Why not?" he asked.

" _Why not!_ Where have you been for the past few weeks, she tried to kill me numerous times. Now get your hands off me," I said while jerking my hand out of his grasps. I opened my car door and he said nothing further as I jumped into the car and peeled out of the parking lot. This day just keeps getting weirder.


	18. Dead, Undead

**A/N THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.  
**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.**

 _"I….I'm sorry Enzo but I can't help you with that," I stepped around him to get to my car, but stop when his hand grabbed my arm.  
_

" _Why not?" he asked._

" _Why not? Where have you been for the past few weeks, she tried to kill me numerous times. Now get your hands off me," I said while jerking my hand from his grasps. I opened my car door and he said nothing further as I jumped into the car and peeled out of the parking lot. This day just keeps getting weirder._

 **CHAPTER EIGHTEEN: Dead, Undead**

"Hey Bonnie, Joe called and wanted me to help her with some things in regards to the wedding so I couldn't stay long. I left your invitation with Damon, I'll see you tomorrow."

I removed the phone from my ear as soon as I finished listening to Caroline's voice message. Pulling up at my house, I pulled out my house keys from the bag to open my door. I spotted Damon sitting on the porch steps. He didn't move or indicated that he had heard me approaching. I moved closer and sat beside him on the steps. He didn't look at me or anything and I released a soft sigh and brought my knees up to my chest wrapping my arms around them.

"I love you, Damon," I said, the words tumbling out of my mouth without a thought. I chance a look over to him and found him staring back at me. His face didn't give me any indication of what was going through his mind. I saw his lips twitched into a small smile then he shook his head at me.

"Is that your apology for this morning? Because if it is, your _not_ gonna get off that easy." He said amusement clear in his tone of voice.

"I'm sorry, I should have talked to you about my dream, it just caught me off guard and I didn't even understand it myself," He nodded his head in understanding then said.

"I know but you still should have talked to me about it," He replied almost sternly.

"Your right, I'm just so used to sorting this stuff out on my own that I didn't think to share my thoughts with you," I said moving closer to him and he immediately opened his arms for me and brought me close to his side.

"I get it, I do but you're not alone anymore, and you'll never be again," I turned my face up on his shoulders and he brought his lips down to meet mine. His lips moved leisurely over mine for a couple of seconds before he moved away. My eyes snapped open to meet his and he smirked down at me.

"You, have a lot of making up to do". I rolled my eyes and smiled.

I told him everything about the dream and while I thought maybe it was just my subconsciousness playing tricks on me. Damon wasn't easily convinced that it wasn't something to take seriously.

* * *

Over the next couple of days, our focus was on Alaric's and Joe's wedding and Caroline had enlisted me to help her with the decorations. I haven't seen or heard from Elena since the night Damon made it clear who his choice was.

I was on my way up from Caroline's basement with some boxes of decorations in my hand to sort. When I heard Caroline's voice from the stairway.

"So you never quite told me what you did, to make Elena said that she didn't want to speak to you at the moment," I sigh in exasperation, I can only imagine how Elena twisted that story to her benefit, trying to paint me as the bad guy. I dropped the boxes on the floor of the living room and turned to Caroline.

"Trust me I didn't do anything to her, Damon just told her the truth," I said bending and pulling out the contents of the boxes.

"Wow, that must have been some conversation," she said moving around to face me. "Come on Bonnie, I need the meaty details," I stopped what I was doing and looked up at her. I have to give her something right, if I don't, she'll never give up. This was Caroline we're talking about.

I told Caroline what happened and she also thought Elena was out of line and never should have said some of the things that she did. She was also very surprised to hear what happened between Damon and me. She was still wary of him, and the circumstances of how we got together, But she was happy for me.

Much to my embarrassment, she requested every little detail about what happened between Damon and I. I happily shared, we haven't had any girl time in a while and I didn't realize how much I needed someone to talk to.

By the time the day of the wedding arrived everything was set up and ready to go.

It felt so normal to be having a wedding right down to even Joe freaking out and having cold feet. It makes me happy that we all have at least some normality left in our lives. We all still have basic human desires, even though almost none of us are completely human. We are all affected by the laws of nature in some way.

Damon was Alaric's best man and he felt happy about that, he looked so good in his black suit and tie. I almost didn't let him leave the house with how sexy he looked. He, of course, made plans to ravish me later on which I am so looking forward to, I can hardly wait.

Joe looked very beautiful walking down the isle in her snow white dress. Her hair was done elegantly. The whole scenery had me thinking if one day that could be me. Then I realized that it was a very complicated matter. It would all come down to a choice I'd have to make, of whether or not I wanted to be a vampire.

My mood fell a little at the thought, would I really want to be a vampire? I don't think I could, not by choice anyway. I shook my head and tried to banish those thoughts from my mind. I focused on my surroundings. Caroline really did a wonderful job with this place, although it was a barn you couldn't tell if you were seeing it like this for the first time.

Everything looked very intricate and sparkling and the atmosphere was exciting. My eyes moved up to the podium where Alaric stood with Joe. I hadn't been able to spend a lot of time with Joe but the little time I was with her during the decorating I got to know more about her and she was a perfect match for Alaric.

My eyes shifted over to Damon who stood at Alaric side. His eyes suddenly shifted and singled me out in the crowd as if he could tell I was thinking about him and sent a smirked my way. His actions brought a smile to my lips and I rolled my eyes at him.

My spirits were high again until my eyes landed on Elena. I didn't even know that she was coming until I saw her walked in. She stared at Damon and I as we stood beside Caroline and Stefan by the door when she entered and she had this look.

I felt almost sorry for her, the two guys that she thought she had wrapped around her fingers were gone. She has no one to blame but herself though. She drove them away from her, she thought they would always be fighting over her and begging her to take them back.

The look in her eyes at that moment was like a realization of what she had done. She had basically taken the cure hoping it would get her Damon, even though she told me she couldn't see herself with him. I can't help but feel sorry for her, though.

I heard Alaric and Joe reciting their vows and returned my attention back to them. At that moment I felt something strange, it was as if I was drawn back into that nightmare. Suddenly Alaric was crying out and Joe was falling to the ground. Everyone was rising from their seats I didn't know what was happening.

My eyes then widen as Kai appeared out of nowhere on the podium behind Joe, with horror I watched as he stabbed her repeatedly with a knife. I started moving toward them but someone grabbed me from behind and I was knocked out.

* * *

I woke up and immediately grabbed my head, it was pounding. I looked around my surroundings I was somewhere out in the woods, what the hell was going on. I heard leaves being crunched under boots and turned in that direction, Lily.

"How the hell did you get out?" I asked as she walked closer to where I sat leaning on a tree.

"You have Kai to thank for that," she said a small smile playing on her lips.

"Yes, Me," Kai said appearing almost right beside me, I sprang to my feet and turn to him. I tried to think of a way I could escape these loons.

"You Bonnie Bennett left me to die, in another prison world after I apologized," he said conceitedly.

"You didn't deserve my forgiveness, after all, you did the exact same thing to me," I said before holding both my hands up, I immediately snapped Lily's neck and she fell but Kai was fighting my magic. Somehow his magic was enhanced as if he drawing it from something. My nose started to bleed by just trying to get that grip to snap his neck.

I just wasn't strong enough, I fell to the ground in exhaustion. Taking another look at Kai I realize he must have turned himself into a vampire and was drawing his magic from his body. Moving my arms around the area where I was, I manage to grab in my hand a small piece of wood before I was suddenly being pulled by Kai until he had me by the neck levitating above ground.

"I have waited so long for this," He sneered into my face. "No one is coming for you this time Bonnie,"

"Don't worry I can take care of myself," I managed to croak out before using what energy I had left to send the piece of wood into the side of his neck. He immediately let go of me and this time when I tried to snap his neck there was no resistance. I searched around the forest trying to figure out where exactly I was or how far they had brought me. I suddenly heard someone calling my name Damon.

"Damon I'm here," I said, relieved that he was okay.

"Bonnie? I think you are marked by the angel death, or something" I sigh with happiness and relief when I heard his voice closer to where I was.

"Damon," I said when he appeared in front of me.

"Bonnie," He replied relief evident in his voice. "Your hurt, I can smell blood" He brought his wrist to his lips, and immediately bit into it.

"It's just a scratch, how did you find me?" I asked, he ignored my questions and continued to try to give me his blood.

"Please just humor me I'm still a little worried, you disappeared on me, once I have you home in the safety of my arms I'll tell you everything." I humored him and took some of his blood. He then lifted me into his arms and I felt the feeling of almost gliding as he ran. As we continued on our way trees flashing by me, I was suddenly being thrown through the air as the feeling of Damon's body against mine disappeared.

A scream was barely able to squeeze through my throat before I was slammed hard into a tree and fell to the ground with a heavy thud. I groaned as pain-saturated my body. I was able to twist my head and caught glimpse and flashes of two people fighting. Oh my god it was Kai, but how? He recovered fast.

I tried to move to get to my feet but I shouted in pain when I found a small piece of a tree branch lodged deep into my side. I started to panic as I looked down onto my side and discovered a lot of blood pouring from my body. I was so sick and tired of getting mortally wounded. I hated this place, I hated all these people who keep coming after me. I hated being in pain and feeling like I have to fight every single day just to live.

I jumped in surprise as Damon's body was thrown against a nearby tree, I heard a groan then he rolled towards me. I tried to say something to him but before I could Kai had him in a headlock.

"Kai please, don't hurt him, you're angry with me, I was the one who left you there," I cried, pleading with him. He looked over to me, and laugh.

"Oh Bonnie, Bonnie, Bonnie, such a martyr, well it seems things have changed between you two, hasn't it?" He turned back to Damon tightening his grip on his neck while giving him an aneurysm. I watch Damon practically being tortured in front of me and I couldn't do anything but lay there and bleed to death, some Witch I was.

"Kai please," the words trembled as they left my lips, I couldn't believe I was begging Kai for anything. He suddenly started to laugh, really laugh, throwing his head back, taking the opening of him being distracted I used whatever energy I had left and pushed him of Damon then throw a piece of branch to him. Immediately he took it and jumped at Kai, stabbing him in the stomach then his heart. My vision began getting hazy and I swore I felt as if I was border lining between life and death.

"Damon," I cried when I felt as if I was slipping away. "Bonnie, please hold on," I heard him said, and I tried, I really did.

I heard his voice again closer. "Bonnie please wake up, please," He was crushing me to his chest, I could taste the overwhelming bitterness of his blood in my mouth. I started to choke and turn my face to the side to get some of the blood from my mouth.

"No Bonnie, don't do that, you need to get some down," He scowled at me, turning me back, on my back.

"I've swallowed enough, what did you do, cut an arm off? Why is there so much blood?" I asked looking down at myself.

"Most of it, is yours, Oh god, scare me to death well you? I swear, I'm just gonna have to turn you into a Vampire, if I want to keep you in my life forever." He continued to rant as he rose to his feet and started to pace. I looked up at him from my place on the floor bemused. I loved him so much more in that moment than ever. I slowly rose to feet testing my newly healed body.

"Where is Kai?" I asked. "Dead," He answered gesturing to the body to his right. I felt relief flooded through me. I moved over to Damon as he continued his foolish little rant about me being marked by the angel of death. I sealed my lips over his own, that seemed to shut him up as he pulled me to his chest and kissed me deeper. He began walking me backward until my back hit a tree. Suddenly I was being relieved of panties as he pulls my dress around my waist.

"Wait, Damon I... we can't," I said in a panic, looking around our surroundings, and wondering who else could be out there. My eyes then shifted to Kai's body lying a few feet away from us, and it just didn't seem right.

"Oh yes we can, and we will," He said as he hoisted me up the tree, locking my legs around his waist and ending my protests with his tongue and cock.

We arrived at the hospital a couple of hours later After Damon got a phone call from Stefan to meet him at the hospital. Caroline and Stefan were sitting on two of the chairs by a door.

"What happened?" I asked, as Damon and I approached them.

"Something's wrong with Elena, she won't wake up," Stefan said, I immediately felt concerned, Elena and I might not be on speaking terms but I would never wish her harm.

"Why can't the doctors help her?" I walked over to where Caroline sat with Stefan and as I approached she stood and hugged me.

"Bonnie we were all so worried, you disappeared and Kai did something to us, we couldn't move. Everyone was dead and oh my god it's all a mess." Caroline said while she continues to hug me.

"The Doctors don't understand what's going on, they said there's nothing wrong with her. It's as if she's in a coma," Stefan said answering my previous question.

"I bet Kai and Lily had something to do with this, at least we don't have to worry about him anymore but she is a problem," I said, glad that I won't have to see his monstrous face again.

"Why is that?" Caroline asked.

"Because she's no longer in the Boarding house basement."


	19. Linked Faiths

**A/N THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.  
**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.**

" _The Doctors don't understand what's going on, they said there's nothing wrong with her but it's as if she's in a coma," Stefan said answering my previous question._

 _"I bet Kai and Lily had something to do with this, at least we don't have to worry about him anymore but she is a problem," I said, glad that I won't have to see his monstrous face again.  
_

 _"Why is that?" Caroline asked.  
_

 _"Because she's no longer in the Boarding House basement."  
_

 **CHAPTER NINETEEN: Linked Faiths**

"She escaped, how?" Stefan asked.

"She didn't escape, Kai must have found her and let her out," I said moving to sit beside Caroline.

"So what are we going to do?" Caroline asked.

"My mother is not much of a problem," Stefan said, and I gave him a strange look.

" _Not a problem_? She tried to kill me about three times now, _how_ is she not a problem?" I asked, slightly perplexed with him.

"If she wanted you dead, you would have been," He replied.

"Stefan, I know our mother means much to you, but she's not the same person we once knew," Damon said trying to reason with Stefan.

"She's still our mother, we can't give up on her, how many times have we given up on each other, yet look at us now," He countered gesturing a hand between himself and Damon.

"That's different Stefan-..."

"How? We have to fight for her too just as we have always fought for each other,"

"She doesn't want us to fight for her, she doesn't even consider us her family anymore, she replaced us, Stefan," Stefan shook his head at Damon before saying.

"She's still my mother, even if she is no longer yours," He then turned and walked away from us down the hallway. I didn't know how to look at the situation. I understood where Stefan was coming from but it was my life and Lily was more determined to kill me now more than anyone else.

She was a crazy woman, her sons were here and alive, that in itself was a miracle and she was still hung up on a fake family she left in a prison world. If that wasn't crazy I didn't know what was. Caroline eventually left to go after Stefan and Damon took Caroline's seat beside me.

"How are you feeling?" He asked placing an arm around my shoulder and pulling me to him.

"I'm fine, sorry about Stefan, I understand where he is coming from," I said turning to look at him. "She's your mother too,"

"I don't care, I don't need her in my life, I've lived 150 years as a vampire and I've never thought about her once." He replied.

"Not once?" I asked him skeptically. " I know I thought about my mother, a lot, even though she left me," I said twisting my hand in my lap and remembering those times when I use to wonder. What could possibly be so wrong with me for my own mother to leave me? My mother and I weren't perfect but we have been trying to work things out.

"I don't want to talk about this anymore, I just want to take you home and disappear into your body for hours," My eyes widen, wasn't he just doing that? All of a sudden, I was hot all over again as I saw the look on his face and how it reflected, his seriousness. Before I could spontaneously combust with lust, he spoke again.

"But first I'm gonna give Alaric a call, I didn't get the chance to check up on him before," He said and my mind immediately went to Alaric and Joe, _oh my god_ Joe. I couldn't even begin to imagine how Alaric felt at that moment. Damon placed a light kiss on my lips before rising to his feet and told me he would be back. I watched him walked down the hall before turning the corner.

I sat there alone in the hall reflecting on what a disaster today turned out to be. I still couldn't believe the things that happened. I sat up straight and peered through the window at Elena in the room beside me. Slowly I rose to my feet and walked into the room.

She looked so still, if I didn't saw the slow rise and fall of her chest I would have sworn she was dead. I stepped closer and I could see fleeting movement beneath the surface of her skin. Curious, I stepped closer and touched her hand. My heart sped up in my chest and I withdrew my hand immediately as a jolt of electricity slithered through my body. _My god_ , he linked us, and not just any link either.

I ran out of the room and down the hall looking for Damon. He was just outside the hospital building talking on the phone.

"Damon," He turned to look at me confused before removing the phone from his ear.

"What is it?" He asked softly as I came closer. " He linked us Damon, Elena and me, we're linked," I said quickly. He quickly wrapped up his phone call, before turning to me.

"What? what kind of link?" He asked urgently.

"It's a life link, we have to get her somewhere safe Damon," I reentered the hospital with Damon hot on my heels.

"Bonnie wait a minute, what's a life link?" As we neared the room where Elena resides I started to explain only to halt when I saw the empty bed.

"Our lives are intertwined if she dies-...Oh my god," I cried running into the room and staring unbelievably at the empty bed.

"If she dies what Bonnie?" Damon said grabbing me by the shoulders and turning me to face him. Didn't he saw the empty bed?

"So do I," I croaked out and watched as Damon's face changed in horror.

"Well, c..can you break it or something, please tell me you can do something,"

"I don't know I've never ventured far into this type of magic before,"

"What's going on?" Caroline asked we turned to look at her by the door, Stefan stood behind her. " Where's Elena?" He asked and looked befuddled at the bed.

"Someone took her, Kai linked Bonnie to her, if she dies so does Bonnie," Damon explained quickly.

"Lily took her, it has to be her," I said then Damon suddenly turn to me, biting into his wrist before practically shoving his blood down my throat, as if I didn't have enough of his blood in my body already.

"No Damon, I don't want that," I said trying to push him from me but failing.

"Like hell you don't," He said, holding me in place with his wrist at my lips. Caroline pulled him from me as I wiped the blood from my mouth.

"What is wrong with you?" Caroline asked Damon acidly. He looked at me but I couldn't look back. He didn't say anything but left the room. I didn't know what to think. Him giving me his blood, while it meant a lot, it was like he accepted that Elena was going to die.

I didn't want that, I wanted her to live, regardless of what happened between us. I still cared about her, and there was a time that Damon loved her unconditionally. It was really hard to accept that he would just stop loving her so quickly.

"We have to find her Caroline," I said, looking back at the empty bed, remorsefully. How could Lily have taken her so quickly? I wasn't outside for two minutes. She must have been here all along, spying on us.

"Where do we start?"

I was able to contact Jeremy who was not too happy to see or hear from me. Elena had informed him of Damon and my relationship and he somehow had it in his head that I was sleeping with Damon from we were in the prison world and that was the reason I broke up with him.

He only agreed to help when he found out that Elena was in danger, but he somehow _also_ pinned the situation on me. Saying that it was all my fault. Caroline was quick to put him in his place and he remained silent after that but I still couldn't help but think that maybe he was right. If only I had accepted Kai's apology and be done with it, this was why nothing good _ever_ comes from seeking revenge. It took awhile but I was able to do a locator spell with Jeremy's blood and found out that Elena was at some sort of abandon shipyard on the outskirts of town.

"I found her," I said before writing down the address and giving it to Caroline.

* * *

As we were getting ready to leave, Damon came to join us, I thought that he wouldn't show up after he left us at the hospital almost 4 hours ago.

"I didn't think you would be coming with us," I said to him as he approached us.

"I wasn't gonna let you guys go alone, I can't lose you, Bonnie. After all that happen tonight, I know it's not what you wanna hear but I'm not sorry about earlier, I would do anything to keep you safe and alive." He said with conviction and unapologetic in his stance. I didn't exactly know what to say to that. No one has ever wanted to protect me so fiercely before. But if only it wasn't at the expense of someone I cared about, someone I knew he cared about as well.

We eventually left for the location of the shipyard where Elena was being kept. We slowed down a couple blocks away and moved by foot the rest of the way. The shipyard was deathly silent, eerie looking and cold.

Everyone was on alert and moving cautiously through the entrance way. There were piles on top of piles of trailers surrounding the area. We slipped between them and exit out into an open space. It was empty, no one in sight. We didn't exactly know the first place to start looking.

"Let's split up we'll cover more ground that way," Stefan suggested, but I didn't like the idea of us separating from each other. Lily was a smart woman, it could be a trap. I voiced my displeasure with the idea but Stefan insisted. We came to an agreement and Damon and I went in one direction while Stefan and Caroline went in another.

"Are you mad at me for earlier, when I gave you my blood?" Damon asked all of a sudden and I stop walking and turn around to look at him. Was I mad at him? Of course not.

"No Damon I'm not mad at you, I'm just doubtful is all," I replied before turning back around and continuing the search for Elena.

"Of what? My feelings for you?" he asked again, utterly confused.

"No, I don't doubt that I doubt that you no longer have feelings for Elena," I said.

"But I don't," he said briskly. I twirled around and eyed him unconvincingly.

"You are lying to yourself if you believe that, I just want the truth Damon, I'll understand if you still care for her,"

"I thought we were passed you comparing yourself to Elena when it comes to me," He said, perplexed.

"I'm not doing that, I just…..please Damon, I don't want to argue with you about this..-" I fell short when something flew past my head and hit Damon in the shoulder. I looked in the direction it came from and saw Enzo with some sort of gun. I presume a vervain gun since Damon fell to his knees weaken.

"Enzo, she has brain-washed you! I should have known you,d be helping her, " I said narrowing my eyes at him.

"Yeah you should have, say goodbye to your boyfriend," he said, then quickly pulled a stake from the inside of his Jacket. Was he really about to try and kill Damon? I anticipated his movement and was able to stop him before he could attack me or perhaps stake Damon.

"You are disgusting Enzo, and she's a psycho," I said while giving him the most powerful aneurysms I could do. He fell to the ground in anguish and started to twist around in pain.

"Goodbye Enzo," I said before speaking the words. "Vas Matos Incendia," I watched the flames move from where I stood right to where Enzo was, but before I could watch him burn. I heard Damon shouted my name right before I felt something plunged into my chest through my back and gripped my heart. I was so intensely surprised my body was numb from the pain that radiated from my chest.

"Mother no!, Don't" I heard Damon shouted from the ground.

"Why shouldn't I? Kai was the only one who could find my family. He told me that my friends are linked to him, so if anything were to happen to him, they would all be….be gone, and you killed him." she cried.

"So tell me why shouldn't I?" she shouted before turning me in the direction to where Damon kneeled on the ground, Vervain from the shot by Enzo still coursing through his body. The gripped she had on my heart tighten and blood spilled from my mouth onto my clothes. The pain flowing through my chest was indescribable.

I saw the anguish on Damon's face and I felt it coursing through my body. Maybe I was _really_ marked by the angel of death.

"You took everything from me and now, I'm gonna take everything away from you, both Bonnie and Elena," Lily said, then continued, "You don't deserve him," I heard her whispered into my ear. I was stunned by the pain as I felt my heart being ripped away from me. The last thing I saw was Damon's anguished face before total darkness.

Author's Note: Okay, it's coming to the end of my story, I want to thank you guys for sticking by me and for all the reviews. I hope you guys check out some of my other stories and tell me what you think. Until next time, have a great weekend.


	20. HOPE

**A/N THANK YOU GUYS FOR ALL YOUR REVIEWS, FOLLOWS AND FAVS NO MATTER HOW SMALL IT MEANS ALOT.  
**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS, NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE TO. THEY ALL BELONG TO L.J SMITH.**

 **SUMMARY: BONNIE'S MIND AND HEART ARE AT WAR ABOUT WHO TO LOVE, AFTER SPENDING FOUR MONTHS WITH, WHOM SHE CALLS THE DEVIL, SHE BEGAN QUESTIONING WHICH TO TRUST HER HEART OR HER MIND.**

 _"You took everything from me and now, I'm gonna take everything from you, both Bonnie and Elena," Lily said, then continued, "You don't deserve him," I heard Lily whispered into my ear. I was stunned by the pain as I felt my heart being ripped away from me. The last thing I saw was Damon's anguished face before total darkness._

 **CHAPTER TWENTY: HOPE  
**

 _ **Damon's POV**_

The vervain was still coursing through my veins as I watch in utter horror as Bonnie fell lifelessly to the ground. My heart felt as if it was pulled from my chest along with hers. It was the worst feeling I'd ever felt in my life. Watching the woman I loved being killed by my own mother.

The fire that would have brought Enzo to his burning death immediately vanished with Bonnie's last breath. Enzo then pulled himself from the ground and back to his feet. Her lifeless eyes still staring at me, my hands went to my chest clawing at my shirt as the pain within felt like a fire that would engulf me and burn me to ash.

"Well, what do you know, it wasn't Elena, all this time Bonnie was your real Soulmate. Such as shame and you spent all that time chasing after Elena," I heard my mother said walking over to where I was on the ground. As she moved closer, a hatred so strong welled up in me, the likes of which I've never felt before.

Elena briefly flashed into my mind but thoughts of her weren't enough to dim the burn within my chest. I hated to admit it but my mother was right, Bonnie was my real soulmate. Accepting the fact that she was what I have been longing for all this time made me hated my mother even more for taking her away from me.

"You are my mother, you gave birth me, we are family. Stefan and I thought you dead along time ago, and all of a sudden you were back in our lives again, and to think I had _hope_ ," I laughed at the irony, _hope,_ such a selfish little word. _Hope,_ that things would get better, _hope,_ that we could all live a normal life. _**Hope,**_ I thought once more with disdain.

"What kind of mother are you? What kind of mother takes happiness away from their children," I asked utterly disgusted by her presence before me.

"What kind of son take happiness away from _their_ mother?" she asked back at me, and at that moment I just wanted to kill her, I wanted to rip her head clean off. Stefan and Caroline chose that moment to arrive and I felt a little hatred for them too. Where the fuck were they?

"Oh my god Bonnie," I heard Caroline cry running to where Bonnie's body was, it hurts just to think about it.

"Mother, what have you done?" Stefan asked moving over to where I was. "Your brother took something from me, so I took something back," she said as if she was justified. I couldn't bear to hear her speak any more to see her breathing while Bonnie didn't. I was angry, enraged and out of fucking control. Slowly the vervain started to purge itself from my body while revenge took over my soul.

Stefan and my mother continued talking back and forth, but I couldn't hear a word. I was too consumed by anger and rage. The funny part was I think I deserved this, to feel all this loss and sorrow. I think it's payback and boy was it a bitch.

As soon as I felt my body purged itself of the vervain, I grabbed a hold of my mother by her neck in a flash. Caroline quickly snapped Enzo's neck when he made a move towards us. She struggled in my grasp but I held her tighter, squeezing the life from her.

"Damon," She gasped, grabbing onto the hand I had around her neck. As I was about to end her life, Stefan stopped me with that annoying hero complex of his. I rolled my eyes as words I couldn't care less about left his mouth.

"Damon, wait we can fix this, you don't have to…." He stopped his speech when I threw her head over to where he stood. Stunned, he stared at our mother's head for a few seconds before he looked up at me. My expression made it very clear that it was the end of our conversation.

I walked over to where Enzo laid, bend down and pulled out his heart from his chest then placed it beside his head on the ground. Stefan and Caroline didn't dare say a word to me as I walked over to where Bonnie's body was. I sat down on the ground beside her and stared at her face.

"Did you guys find Elena?" I asked my voice void of any emotion whatsoever. I felt totally empty inside and my voice reflected that.

"Yes," Stefan answered cautiously, I didn't know why.

"Is she alive?" I asked again.

"She is but when we found her, she wasn't awake," he said, I thought I would at least feel relief hearing that Elena was alive but I just felt worst, I didn't know why.

"Get her and let's get out of here," I said picking Bonnie up off the ground and holding her close to my chest. I turned to hope again, as much as I hated it. I begged it to bring her back. I hoped that my blood was still in her system and was able to revive her. I waited and hoped.

I sat in the car Bonnie laying across my lap, waiting for my brother and Caroline to get Elena, so we could get home. Her skin was warm but barely, it got colder by the second and the hope I had that she would wake up soon got colder too. The more I waited the more irritated I got, where were they? I didn't want to leave Bonnie to go look for them, I don't think I'll ever be able to leave her again.

An hour and a half later Stefan and Caroline walked up to the car. Stefan had Elena's body in his arms. He looked crestfallen and Caroline was on the verge of crying.

"What is it?" I asked. Caroline answered barely able to say the words.

"She has a hole in her chest, her heart is gone too, she's dead Damon."

* * *

 _ **Four Days Later**_

It's been four days, Elena was dead and as it seems so was Bonnie. I didn't know what to do, Elena was a part of me and in some ways, will always be, but she was still my past. Bonnie held my future in her hands, she still does.

I brought her to the house and rested her body on my bed. I haven't left the room since. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't function. Not without her, I never knew how much I needed her presence. I never knew how much I needed _her._ Now that I have stopped and thought about it, she has always been there.

Since the moment I arrived in Mystic Falls. Other than Elena, she had been the center of mostly everything. I had always thought that Elena was the love of my life, how wrong that was. Elena and Katherine had alway been, spirits, circling around Stefan and I. I realize now that they were just the obstacles both of us had to overcome until we arrived at our final destination.

Bonnie and Caroline, both Elena and Katherine were the road leading us to our final stop, Our life line. And now I've lost mine. Which was so typical of me, I swore I would protect her and I didn't. Perhaps I didn't deserve her, perhaps I didn't deserve happiness for all the shit I've done. Could it really be that? Was I really that fucked? A knock on the door pulled me out of my thoughts, it was, of course, my dear baby brother.

"You can't go on like this Damon, you need to eat something." He said moving further into the room. He took a brief look over at the bed where Bonnie laid, still dead.

"I'm not hungry," I replied, not even turning to face him.

"She wouldn't want you to starve yourself Damon, she-..."

"Don't! Don't give some speech about how she would have wanted me to live my life,"

"Damon, it's been four days, no vampire transformation have ever taken that long before,"

"She's a witch, her body needs to adjust,"

"Do you really believe that? Her mother was a witch too, she didn't take this long to change,"

"Bonnie's different, she's special," I said clinging to that hope as tight as I could. I couldn't take any more of Stefan's reasoning bullshit or whatever it was he was trying to do.

"Damon-..."

"Stefan, just leave please,"

"I just wanted to help,"

"I know, but I can't accept your help right now," I waited for any response but I only heard the door close when he exited. I looked over to the bed where she laid unmoved. Her chest still, showing no sign of breathing. My body felt drained as I moved to sit beside her on the bed staring at her beautiful face.

I had refrained from touching her since I placed her on the bed. Fearing that her skin has gone ice cold and I would be forced to accept the inevitable. Slowly I brought my hand up to her face and brushed my hand against her cheek. My hand jerked back in shocked to the feeling of, _warmth_.

If I had been alive I swore my heart would've swelled in my chest, she was still warm, four days and her body haven't gone cold, if that wasn't some kind of witchcraft then I didn't know what was, there was **HOPE**.

 **THE END**


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